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Post by Deleted on Jul 17, 2013 11:44:15 GMT -5
The foam blades are made of a foam that is highly toxic. A malfunction causes the blades to fly off and break apart. You swallow some foam and die of poisoning.
*when my true love gets kidnapped by snow fairies, I save him by dancing and also turn the fairies back into the people they were before, giving them back their compassion*
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Post by Mostly Harmless (flufflepuff) on Jul 17, 2013 12:10:45 GMT -5
That's noble. But as it turns out, he was cheating on you with one of the snow faeries and leaves you, causing you to kill him. The death penalty is fully enforced in your universe. Goodbye.
*snuggles with a harmless pillow dragon* >w<
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Post by Gelquie on Jul 17, 2013 18:31:33 GMT -5
The pillow dragon is amicable enough. Until it rolls over with you still on it. It rolls over right onto your head, and you suffocate.
*Stretches.*
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Post by Coaster on Jul 17, 2013 21:48:46 GMT -5
You are inside a telephone booth supported by an egg at each corner. Moving the booth by colliding your arm with it as you stretch causes the eggs to break; the booth tips over, and all the sharp weapons and kitchen implements that were on top of it fall on your head.
*calls my best friend via land-line*
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Post by Terra on Jul 17, 2013 21:55:31 GMT -5
A serial killer has tapped your phone line in an attempt to figure out your daily living patterns. He picks up from your conversation with your best friend that you're going somewhere alone where it'll be dark and deserted...and where he could easily find you and pull you into a shadowy corner and stab you. Which he does.
*shops at the grocery store*
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Post by Deleted on Aug 2, 2013 22:21:25 GMT -5
That store is run by aliens. You find out, and then they find out that you found out. They turn you into a slug and step on you before you can find out about their horrible plot to take over the world through Venusian bananas.
*is a benevolent queen known for caring for her people and rebuilding another ruined kingdom out of the goodness of my heart*
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Post by Coaster on Aug 2, 2013 22:49:05 GMT -5
They're not such a big fan of national development, and quickly uprise against what they see as the tyrannical monarchy under which they are oppressed. The benevolent queen that brought them out of poverty is the last to face the guillotine's bloodthirst, but unfortunately, she still takes the hit.
*plants flowers in Animal Crossing*
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Post by Deleted on Aug 3, 2013 12:58:32 GMT -5
Some very grumpy hedgehog HATES flowers. He mails you a letter coated in poison. It's so sharp that you get a papercut and die.
*saves a young princess from the cruel tyranny of her stepmother (who's an evil queen) and lives to tell the tale*
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Post by Yoyti on Aug 3, 2013 13:09:44 GMT -5
While the queen is singing her lengthy coloratura solo, she reinstates control over her daughter and has her stab you. No magic flute to save you this time!
*Sells a soul -- not mine, someone else's -- for my own immortality*
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Post by Coaster on Aug 3, 2013 13:49:15 GMT -5
The soul recipient demands a refund because you offered him a ginger (no offense to anyone intended, just using the saying) and takes yours instead.
*clips my toenails with sanitary and operational toenail clippers*
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Post by Deleted on Aug 3, 2013 19:48:38 GMT -5
Unfortunately, they're also ensouled toenail clippers. In order to turn back into their true form (a rabbit) they cut open one of your veins. Such was the terms of the evil fox who turned the rabbit into clippers. Needless to say, you bleed to death.
*is the best friend of a warrior goddess, thus she protects me all the time*
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Post by Coaster on Aug 3, 2013 23:21:54 GMT -5
Unfortunately, this particular warrior goddess isn't very strong compared to some of the other warrior goddesses that call her mean names and beat her up sometimes. They notice you're one of her best friends and decide to kill you to get some sort of revenge on her.
*posts on the You're Not Dead! board instead of this one*
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Post by Yoyti on Aug 4, 2013 7:52:55 GMT -5
Yoyti, not having any post here sufficient to respond to, gets angry and kills you.
*Learns the secret of rising from the dead at will, to the point that Death just sort of gives up*
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Post by Deleted on Aug 4, 2013 14:21:05 GMT -5
Death's sister, however, is mad. She is more powerful than Death and when she kills you, you stay dead forever. So she does just that.
*is chosen as the next queen over my evil twin sister since I'm sweet and kind and she's mean and selfish*
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Post by Coaster on Aug 4, 2013 14:35:00 GMT -5
Your plot armor ran out when you ascended to the throne, so she still has free reign to come up and usurp the throne by force. Your kingdom is thusly turned into a dictatorship for the next-closest member of the royal family to eventually go on an epic quest to free the kingdom from, but as for you, you're dead in the first five minutes of the show.
*kills everything that has murderous intent in a universe with no death penalty or points of contact with other universes*
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