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Post by Kaljinyu on Feb 6, 2006 15:45:54 GMT -5
Personally, I think it was nice for NeoStaff to get a little praise in the Editorial this time. I would've offered up some praise, but I thought it was too trivial. n:(
Also, is Snarkie back to answering questions again?
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Post by hmlanden on Feb 6, 2006 21:36:28 GMT -5
I know Kiddo didn't ask for a review, but..."Written at 3am" was a literary masterpiece. I printed it and am going to stick it in my "Inspirational" folder. ^___^
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Post by Kiddo on Feb 6, 2006 23:38:50 GMT -5
I know Kiddo didn't ask for a review, but..."Written at 3am" was a literary masterpiece. I printed it and am going to stick it in my "Inspirational" folder. ^___^ I rarely ask for reviews... I don't like asking for some reason. But are you serious? That thing is the result of sleep deprivation, too much caffeine, and a bad case of the slap-happy giggles. Not really the combination you'd call a literary masterpiece... EDIT: Stupid "Quote" and "Modify" buttons being right next to each other. --Tdyans |
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Post by Tdyans on Feb 7, 2006 0:16:57 GMT -5
But are you serious? That thing is the result of sleep deprivation, too much caffeine, and a bad case of the slap-happy giggles. Not really the combination you'd call a literary masterpiece... I don't know, I hear Kafka had a major case of the slap-happy giggles when he wrote "The Metamorphosis." |
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Post by Kiddo on Feb 7, 2006 0:21:06 GMT -5
But are you serious? That thing is the result of sleep deprivation, too much caffeine, and a bad case of the slap-happy giggles. Not really the combination you'd call a literary masterpiece... I don't know, I hear Kafka had a major case of the slap-happy giggles when he wrote "The Metamorphosis." *curls up in a ball in the corner of her room and rocks back and forth* Happy place happy place happy place.... Kafka scares me. |
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Post by Tdyans on Feb 7, 2006 0:34:40 GMT -5
You do realize that was a joke, right. I think my sarcasm function is busted. Along with that one that keeps me from pushing the wrong dang button when posting.
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Post by Kiddo on Feb 7, 2006 0:37:28 GMT -5
You do realize that was a joke, right. I think my sarcasm function is busted. Along with that one that keeps me from pushing the wrong dang button when posting. I was giving ya a bad time right back. I think my humor button is broken as well. My roomie Katherine once asked me how she could tell if I was giving her a bad time, cause she genuinly can't tell when people are doing that to her. I told her to just watch and if my mouth is moving and words are coming out, I'm giving her a bad time. |
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Post by Tdyans on Feb 7, 2006 0:40:10 GMT -5
You do realize that was a joke, right. I think my sarcasm function is busted. Along with that one that keeps me from pushing the wrong dang button when posting. I was giving ya a bad time right back. I think my humor button is broken as well. My roomie Katherine once asked me how she could tell if I was giving her a bad time, cause she genuinly can't tell when people are doing that to her. I told her to just watch and if my mouth is moving and words are coming out, I'm giving her a bad time. Since I can't see your mouth moving, I guess I'm doomed.  And, since I'm probably ticking everyone off with all the off-topic posting-ness, I'll offer a review or two to anyone who requests it. The only requirements are patience and the ability not to be offended by lengthy bouts of nitpicking. |
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Post by Deleted on Feb 7, 2006 2:22:31 GMT -5
And, since I'm probably ticking everyone off with all the off-topic posting-ness, I'll offer a review or two to anyone who requests it. The only requirements are patience and the ability not to be offended by lengthy bouts of nitpicking. I would love a review for my short story, The Weaver - nitpicking welcomed =) |
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Post by Dan on Feb 7, 2006 17:28:56 GMT -5
And, since I'm probably ticking everyone off with all the off-topic posting-ness, I'll offer a review or two to anyone who requests it. The only requirements are patience and the ability not to be offended by lengthy bouts of nitpicking. I would love a review for my short story, The Weaver - nitpicking welcomed =) Ditto for me, but I'd like it if you reviewed Awakening (a short story). Thanks! |
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Post by fyregyrl on Feb 7, 2006 19:22:38 GMT -5
And, since I'm probably ticking everyone off with all the off-topic posting-ness, I'll offer a review or two to anyone who requests it. The only requirements are patience and the ability not to be offended by lengthy bouts of nitpicking. im a new writer...so i really would like a review for my article To Pound or Not to Pound please |
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Post by Nut on Feb 7, 2006 21:17:56 GMT -5
I was giving ya a bad time right back. I think my humor button is broken as well. My roomie Katherine once asked me how she could tell if I was giving her a bad time, cause she genuinly can't tell when people are doing that to her. I told her to just watch and if my mouth is moving and words are coming out, I'm giving her a bad time. Since I can't see your mouth moving, I guess I'm doomed. And, since I'm probably ticking everyone off with all the off-topic posting-ness, I'll offer a review or two to anyone who requests it. The only requirements are patience and the ability not to be offended by lengthy bouts of nitpicking. You can find plenty to nitpick on in my short story, Pictures in the Clouds. ^^ Thank you very much! |
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Post by Darkwolf on Feb 8, 2006 1:23:46 GMT -5
*hopeful throat clear* If my story, "A Lupe's Tale", could be added to that list to review, I'd appriciate it... Thanks... And if anyone else wants to review it, that'd be nice, too.  |
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Post by Huntress on Feb 8, 2006 10:38:33 GMT -5
*raises eyebrow* I see many requests but not half as many reviews. Not to be impatient or anything but I could still use some feedback on my comic and series... and while I'm waiting, might as well dig through that list. I'll start with articles...
Jhudora: Naughty or Nice?: kehehe, t'was funny :3 Personally I've never considered Jhudora that evil... maybe vile and kinda mean but not evil. The two interviews with Illusen and Fyora were really nice... perhaps the article could've been even longer. Felt kinda short in my opinion. But good work ^^
Kadoatery Denial: I'm not a Kad feeder as I don't have the patience for that (and yep, I'm stingy... those furballs are too spoiled one way or another >.>) but I can see the problem. I bet many people visit Neo mainly for the Kadoaties. That game is weird... ohyeah, the article. What can I say? It's really well written and maybe/hopefully/probably makes someone think about it as well. I can imagine how addictive the game may be... anyway, yush, I really enjoyed this article ^_^
A List for the Greatest Neopian Holiday: Jhudora Day (whoa, gotta love 'em long titles o.o): hehe, that list was pretty creative. And probably even helpful for hopeless Jhudora addicts... that yellow Kacheek part was a good idea ^^ As a friendly suggestion for any future NT pieces: afternotes are usually redundant. I've never been much of a fan of in-story emoticons either, but it's just me.
And comics... or that one comic, as the other one is by me.
He Promised Her Orange: nicely detailed, really ^^ I know such work takes ages in Paint. All those small panels after another got a bit confusing though. As there was no text, going through the comic was really fast and I had to look at it twice to really get the point. Which was funny, bytheway :3 The life of sponge pets can really be hard...
And a randomly picked short story on top of it all. I think I'll go for more short stories later when I feel like it...
Venturing Into Jhudora's Cloud: well, I have to say that the plotline was unexpected. So well done with that one ^^ The story itself was great even though it could've used a bit more talking, or even just thinking. Stories that consist mainly of descriptions and action are pretty hard to read, at least for me *hides behind her excuse of being a foreigner and thus not having English as her mother tongue* Hehe, guess I usually prefer lighter reading ^^; ... And still I enjoyed the story. Original plots are so hard to find these days :3 *nodnod*
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Post by Tdyans at work on Feb 8, 2006 16:08:50 GMT -5
Okay, please no more requests for me unless/until I've finished these ones. The WeaverAn interesting story with a different subject and tone than you often see. I might have liked a little more character development, to get to know the Weaver better, but at the same time, the level of development that there was kind of contributed to the almost fable-like quality of the story. I think I only wanted more character development because the description of other things was so rich. At times you suddenly introduce information that is new to your audience but that you write about as if we should already know it. For instance, the first time that you mention Anora's name ("Anora herself, however, disregarded these comments with disdain.") you do it as if we already know who this Anora is. But you've never told us before that the Weaver's real name is Anora; you've only referred to her as the Weaver up until this point. I had the same reaction to the princess "refraining from swatting the black Spyder away from her face." What Spyder? You refer to it as "the" spyder as if it has already been mentioned, but it hasn't. It's just suddenly appeared here. The writing is generally easy to follow and flows fairly well, but there are a few hiccups here and there with some awkward phrasing, misused words, etc. A few examples: "a respectful gown or other kingly attire" The "other" implies that a respectful gown is a type of kingly attire. I don't know many kings who wear gowns.  "fine clothes and garments" This is rather repetitive. Clothes are garments-- only one word needs to be used. "In turn, her silver needle" "In turn" implies reflexivity, and I don't think there really is any here. "Perhaps the peculiar thing" "Perhaps" implies uncertainty, but there is no uncertainty here about what the peculiar thing about the Weaver is. "The royal Aisha alighted gently from her carriage- pride, elegance, and short-lived beauty hovering about her as though a cloud." The phrasing of that ending is kind of awkward and confusing. It would have worked better to make this a metaphor instead of a simile: "... a cloud of pride... hovering about her." "surroundings more accustomed to her elevated station in society." What you're literally saying and what you mean to say are two different things here, because of how the sentence is arranged. Surroundings aren't "accustomed." People are. Also, why apostrophes instead of quotation marks in dialogue? It seemed a little strange, but also interesting to me, that Anora was so troubled by the spoiled royal attitude and yet, because of the line of business that she was in, she seemed to be contributing to it in a way. The resolution of her using her talent to instead change the princess' attitude was a nice one, but didn't quite come together for me. There is no indication beforehand in the story that Anora has any magical ability or powers. And if she is capable of this, why is this the first time that she has done it? Why did it only just occur to her? It was, as I said, an interesting and nice resolution, but just needed to be set up for a little more earlier on in the story, I think. |
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neo username - dan4884 
