purple
Frequent Visitor
Posts: 117
|
Post by purple on Jul 8, 2016 9:14:15 GMT -5
Hello I'm Hearher . I like anime, manga , reading and writing . I'm 21 Hi, Purple/Heather - are you sure you meant to post that here? This thread is meant for discussion about LGBTQA+-related topics; your post doesn't seem to be on topic? Hello , I'm sorry i cane off as harsh or rude. I didn't mean it like that . I was half awake when I typed that xc
|
|
|
Post by Tiger on Jul 8, 2016 9:26:52 GMT -5
I am sorry if you percieved Tiger's post as hatred and I assure you, that was not the case. We are all very tolerant of LGBTQA+ people here and some of our moderators (myself included) are part of this group. However, your post was more of a general introduction more fitting of the Forum Gates. If you wish to join the group and state your sexuality, that's great! Just please specify that instead of just listing general information about yourself which much better belongs on a newbie welcoming thread, if only to prevent some confusion and let us know how you belong to the LGBTQA+ community. Im so sorry ! I didn't mean or preceive there post as hatred . I was saying about all the ant-lgbtplus things going on . My bad , I should have been more specific. I fit into the lgbtplus community by being a supporter , pan sexual , and engaged to my fiancee . I'm so sorry ! Hi, Purple/Heather - are you sure you meant to post that here? This thread is meant for discussion about LGBTQA+-related topics; your post doesn't seem to be on topic? Hello , I'm sorry i cane off as harsh or rude. I didn't mean it like that . I was half awake when I typed that xc No worries ^^ You didn't come off as harsh, and I figured you were addressing recent events rather than me personally. I just wanted to make sure you hadn't accidentally posted in the wrong thread (I know it's happened to me a few times, ahh getting lost in internet tabs!) since like Celestial said, your original post seemed more like a general introduction for a welcoming thread, rather than one meant to establish yourself as part of the LGBTQA+ community. Sounds like that's all cleared up, though, so we're good =)
|
|
|
Post by Celestial on Jul 8, 2016 9:30:25 GMT -5
I am sorry if you percieved Tiger's post as hatred and I assure you, that was not the case. We are all very tolerant of LGBTQA+ people here and some of our moderators (myself included) are part of this group. However, your post was more of a general introduction more fitting of the Forum Gates. If you wish to join the group and state your sexuality, that's great! Just please specify that instead of just listing general information about yourself which much better belongs on a newbie welcoming thread, if only to prevent some confusion and let us know how you belong to the LGBTQA+ community. Im so sorry ! I didn't mean or preceive there post as hatred . I was saying about all the ant-lgbtplus things going on . My bad , I should have been more specific. I fit into the lgbtplus community by being a supporter , pan sexual , and engaged to my fiancee . I'm so sorry ! It's okay. It's just a misunderstanding and now that it's cleared up, don't worry. Sadly, there are a lot of anti-LGBTQA+ things going on and it is depressing. But congratulations on your engagement and welcome to the community. ^^ (I do recommend introducing yourself on the Forum Gates though, just so the wider forum can get to know you too.)
|
|
purple
Frequent Visitor
Posts: 117
|
Post by purple on Jul 8, 2016 9:33:23 GMT -5
Yes there is ,and it's heart beating . Thank you tiger and celestial for being understanding . I'm glad the misunderstanding was cleared up.
|
|
|
Post by Coaster on Aug 14, 2016 9:28:04 GMT -5
Not much going on here so I figured I would share a picture of me from my local Pride Festival yesterday. =D Hope everyone is doing okay.
|
|
|
Post by Thorn on Aug 28, 2016 8:12:16 GMT -5
Sup guys! Who doesn't like adventures in space, featuring tonnes of pretty colours? I found these lovely shirts and thought some of you might be interested in seeing them, too. =) (I just realised this post doesn't look super relevant yet, so here they are, the cool identity themed shirts/stickers/mugs/stuff!) (I'd been eyeing up the 'Space Ace' design myself, but probably won't go for it because there's a hilarious Jupiter Ascending tee I'd like instead)
|
|
|
Post by Mostly Harmless (flufflepuff) on Sept 28, 2016 8:50:24 GMT -5
This has been on my mind for some time now and I'm purely curious: is it a slap in the face to bi folks if someone refers to themselves as "being X% gay"?
I can see both sides to this: friends of mine tell me bisexual people face lots of erasure, and at the same time a person could hypothetically feel just gay enough to be attracted but not pursue what's mainstream verboten.
Thoughts?
|
|
|
Post by Coaster on Sept 28, 2016 13:37:04 GMT -5
This has been on my mind for some time now and I'm purely curious: is it a slap in the face to bi folks if someone refers to themselves as "being X% gay"? I can see both sides to this: friends of mine tell me bisexual people face lots of erasure, and at the same time a person could hypothetically feel just gay enough to be attracted but not pursue what's mainstream verboten. Thoughts? The pat answer is it's not all about language; labels are meant to be descriptive, not prescriptive, so if it's not actively harmful or appropriative you can probably describe yourself in whatever terms make most sense to you. In this specific case, I feel like the "x% gay" descriptor is actually a pretty good way to explain things--after all, the erasure bi people face is more often from the misconceptions that 1) they need to be EITHER gay OR straight exclusively (and marriage settles it one way or another), or 2) they are hopelessly horny and can't be committed in a relationship and are always up for... stuff. with multiple people at once. Being bi also doesn't mean you need to be attracted to multiple genders equally, or in the same way, or even romantically or sexually. And things like the Kinsey scale (limited though they are) have been around for ages and kind of confirm that. The question, I guess, is whether you specifically want to use the label of bi and give the % as additional clarification. But again, that's totally up to you. In my case I identify as a trans woman rather than a demigirl even though I've sometimes called myself "(mentally) 80% female". And of course, it's not set in stone, either. I used to identify as 100% aro ace (and pretty much was at the time); now I consider myself strongly lesbian-leaning grey/demi-biromantic; maybe in the future I'll call myself straight-up bi, and I don't know yet, but I'll take it as it comes. tl;dr it's up to you. I feel like it's fine, but be sensitive to others if they are hurt by it or just prefer to think about their superficially-similar orientation in different terms. (EDIT: for the record, I am talking in "nonspecific general person" form of you, not necessarily "Cassie" you, just to make it better-readable.)
|
|
|
Post by Shinko on Jan 6, 2017 17:03:02 GMT -5
So while at work today, I caught a glimpse of a magazine on the rack that immediately got my attention. Yeah, that's right- National Geographic Magazine has made their January 2017 issue a special edition all about gender- from what I've skimmed of it so far (yes I did buy it) it has everything from feminist issues to an exploration of nonbinary to even interviews with kids on how gender norms have influenced their perceptions of the world and of themselves. If anybody is interested, I can keep you posted on what I think once I'm done reading it, but I wanted to share this in case anybody else was interested in picking this up. I know it's a topic a lot of the forum finds important and can appreciate getting exposure in something as mainstream as National Geographic Magazine. (If you go looking for it, it's worth noting the magazine has two cover versions- the other one looks like this.)
|
|
|
Post by Thorn on Jan 6, 2017 18:38:00 GMT -5
So while at work today, I caught a glimpse of a magazine on the rack that immediately got my attention. Yeah, that's right- National Geographic Magazine has made their January 2017 issue a special edition all about gender- from what I've skimmed of it so far (yes I did buy it) it has everything from feminist issues to an exploration of nonbinary to even interviews with kids on how gender norms have influenced their perceptions of the world and of themselves. If anybody is interested, I can keep you posted on what I think once I'm done reading it, but I wanted to share this in case anybody else was interested in picking this up. I know it's a topic a lot of the forum finds important and can appreciate getting exposure in something as mainstream as National Geographic Magazine. (If you go looking for it, it's worth noting the magazine has two cover versions- the other one looks like this.) That's just supercool! =D Please do let us know what you think, after reading. Pretty sure at least some shops here sell 'National Geographic' (at the very least, there are a lot of them lying around in doctor's/dentist's waiting rooms =P), so might try track down a copy myself.
|
|
|
Post by Lizzie on Feb 27, 2017 12:44:27 GMT -5
Did anyone actually get to read the gender revolution versions of National Geographic? I didn't I hope they were good...
|
|
|
Post by Shinko on Feb 27, 2017 14:31:05 GMT -5
Did anyone actually get to read the gender revolution versions of National Geographic? I didn't I hope they were good... I did, and while parts were interesting, it suffered somewhat from being 80% third wave feminism and only about 20% discussion of non-cisgender issues. There was a lot of interesting discussion on gender norms and stereotypes, but only one really good, long article that talked about non-cisgenders.
|
|
|
Post by Shinko on Jun 12, 2017 18:18:32 GMT -5
So bit of a complicated question, I hope ya'll don't mind me asking.
Several years ago I wrote a character for a NANOWRIMO story that focused on online relationships. The character in question was biologically male, presented male, and responded to masculine pronouns IRL. Online, however, because of his general personality and his propensity for playing female PC characters in MMOs, all his friends assumed he was female and he made no effort to correct them. When questioned about this by another character (who was reading an IM chat over his shoulder at a coffee shop) the character had a hard time articulating why this didn't bother him. Eventually he just expressed that he didn't care one way or the other about being male or female, or what people addressed him as, and was equally willing to answer to whatever.
At the time I sort of filed the character as "agender" in my head. As I've come to learn more about gender identification, thought, I question if that is a correct classification. When I posit to him the idea of going by "they/them" pronouns, I get a pinched brow and a slight sense of resistance- like he'd take it if it were forced on him, but he prefers gendered pronouns in general because he associates non-gender pronouns with dehumanization and other-ing. (Something relevant to his character background.) Not to say he'd judge people who preferred those pronouns- he just doesn't really care to have them assigned towards himself. So he/him/she/her is fine, but not they/them.
I've looked at other classifications but they don't really fit either. "Genderfluid" was one I considered, but from what I can tell that implies sliding between gender identities which he does not do. There is no one time where he prefers certain pronouns over others. I also looked at androgyne, but that doesn't fit either because it implies a gender identity equal parts masculine and feminine, where the character's identity falls more in line of "IDK, whatever you like, I don't care." Best I could get was "non-binary" which from what I could gather is kind of an umbrella term.
I've been debating expy-ing the character into something at some point, since I really enjoyed writing for him. But before I did that, I wanted to ask about the whole gender conundrum to make sure I'm not falsely representing the issue or mis-assigning labels from my standpoint as a cis-gendered female.
(For those wondering why I stick with masculine pronouns here, it's mostly habit since those were used in-story the most by his IRL friends/family acquaintances. Again, he didn't care one way or the other.)
|
|
|
Post by Celestial on Jun 12, 2017 18:34:43 GMT -5
Hmm...it's tricky because I think gender is quite a personal thing but also a complex thing that we don't really quite fully understand. From what you say though, I feel like "agender" fits. I've come to identify more and more with the agender term, though I still prefer female pronouns and don't feel like "they" is completely fitting, but I wouldn't mind if anybody thought of me as male for whatever reason. I'm just used to female pronouns and stick with them. That and I sometimes think I have a bit of demi-girl in me as well as being agender, since I do identify a little bit with being female but that's going off-topic and into murky territory. He could be similar though. Alternatively- and this is not something I have experience with myself but could suggest- perhaps he is bigender? Like, he identifies as both male and female but is either used to being male and so identifies with that more? He could also be neutrois, which is a neutral gender. If you want to be safe, "non-binary" or "genderqueer" is a fairly umbrella term which can be used if you're not sure what exactly he is. Like I said, gender identity is fluid and complex and there are not enough words to really fully encompass it. If you want to poke around the labels yourself and see if one suits him better than the ones I suggested, there's a gender wiki.
|
|
|
Post by Shinko on Jun 12, 2017 18:47:20 GMT -5
Hmm...it's tricky because I think gender is quite a personal thing but also a complex thing that we don't really quite fully understand. From what you say though, I feel like "agender" fits. I've come to identify more and more with the agender term, though I still prefer female pronouns and don't feel like "they" is completely fitting, but I wouldn't mind if anybody thought of me as male for whatever reason. I'm just used to female pronouns and stick with them. That and I sometimes think I have a bit of demi-girl in me as well as being agender, since I do identify a little bit with being female but that's going off-topic and into murky territory. He could be similar though. Alternatively- and this is not something I have experience with myself but could suggest- perhaps he is bigender? Like, he identifies as both male and female but is either used to being male and so identifies with that more? He could also be neutrois, which is a neutral gender. If you want to be safe, "non-binary" or "genderqueer" is a fairly umbrella term which can be used if you're not sure what exactly he is. Like I said, gender identity is fluid and complex and there are not enough words to really fully encompass it. If you want to poke around the labels yourself and see if one suits him better than the ones I suggested, there's a gender wiki. I don't think bigender- he doesn't identify as male or female, let alone both. Neutrois mebbe, and I still lean towards agender or non-binary for lack of a better term. Hrm. (I am familiar with the gender wiki, but it's singularly unhelpful in a lot of situations because it's articles are very short and not very good at explaining things. >.>)
|
|