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Post by reinarita on Apr 7, 2006 21:06:14 GMT -5
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Post by nikki on Apr 7, 2006 21:09:34 GMT -5
Any reviews for Valiant Petpets at Their Best would be appreciated ^^
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Post by Belle on Apr 7, 2006 21:39:44 GMT -5
It's here!  Reviews coming up... |
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Post by Deleted on Apr 7, 2006 22:13:27 GMT -5
 I'm so happy!!! My story title and custom pic is on the news page!!! I think I'm gonna cry... Reviews for Plushie Eaters Part One would be appreciated.  |
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Post by Dan on Apr 7, 2006 22:17:07 GMT -5
The Skunk and the Teacher-Good story, Rei! Great way to start out. I loved the name, Smelldwena. Very creative. However, I didn't know her real name, so it would have been better if you gave the full name as well to offset the name the others called her. The idea was a bit predictable, and there were a few parts that didn't make sense. For instance, why would her teacher come after her and make up a whole story about forgetting her paper, rather than just telling her about the contest? That way, they'd have a conversation which could develop both characters, which obviously is important. Like I said, it was predictable. While no story is perfect (and I'll be the first to admit my stories are predictable sometimes), it would have made for a more touching ending if it wasn't so obvious that she would give it to her teacher. Basically, just work on the plot details a bit more. Other than that, it was a good start for a promising writer! You're on your way to fame.  |
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Post by Nut on Apr 7, 2006 22:20:00 GMT -5
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Post by Dan on Apr 7, 2006 22:35:42 GMT -5
Cream Cookies-Ooh, good story! I liked it. I enjoyed the characterization of Illusen and Trika, and I especially enjoyed the Mynci reporter. That was my favorite part, XD. Not much to find wrong with, except this minor thing: This sentence is very awkward. It'd make more sense splitting it into two. Besides that, though, it was a great story! You're extremely talented. |
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Post by Belle on Apr 7, 2006 23:05:30 GMT -5
Article ReviewsI was going to review Nikki's piece first but as I scrolled through this week's articles, I found one about Aishas.  Since I am an Aisha-lover, I couldn't help but read it. ^^; Little Known Facts About the Aisha by glamnessThe first paragraph made me nod my head and encouraged me to read the rest of the piece. I enjoyed the author's somewhat laidback writing style. Although this was an informative article, the author didn't sound like she was lecturing. ^^ Anyway, what I loved most about this piece was the facts themselves. The "two main types of Aishas" thing really hooked me and encouraged me to look at my Aisha and see which type she was (which is Saffron, btw). I expected that there would at least be a paragraph or two about how telephatic Aishas are but then again, Aishas are known for their telephatic abilities and so that wouldn't be a "Little Known Fact" anymore, would it? ^^ All in all, a great read! ^^ There were a few problems with the flow of the article (sometimes, the flow from one paragraph to the next is a bit awkward) but it was packed with plenty of details which more than made up for that minor flaw. Valiant Petpets at Their Best by lassie_nikkiFirst of all, I commend you for choosing a fresh topic. ^^ Since, as you mentioned in your article, Altadorian petpets have just been discovered, not much is known about them (and no one has written about 'em before which acted as a hook for me). I also loved that you included the pictures of the petpets. ^^ I know zilch about Altador petpets and it would be such a hassle to look up each petpet just to see how it really looked like. One thing: it would've been nicer if the images were centered and perhaps the names of the petpets could've been in bold. Of course, this has nothing to do with the content of the article. I'm just a bit nitpicky about organization and the article would've looked much neater that way. (Don't mind me. Obsessive-compulsive person coming through. ^^ On to the real review. That is, the content. ^^ You wrote a very nice first paragraph (that part about Meepits really hit home, you know? ). The descriptions were both fun and informative. There were even some parts that made me chuckle (I liked that you didn't try to be funny throughout the article - just some sprinkles of humor is good and you did that well). You have also successfully convinced me that the Alabriss is the perfect petpet for my currently petpetless Aubergine Chia, Chistomise. ^^ Good work! Looking forward to seeing more of your pieces in future Neopian Times issues. Short Story Reviews later...
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Post by nikki on Apr 7, 2006 23:10:29 GMT -5
Article ReviewsValiant Petpets at Their Best by lassie_nikkiFirst of all, I commend you for choosing a fresh topic. ^^ Since, as you mentioned in your article, Altadorian petpets have just been discovered, not much is known about them (and no one has written about 'em before which acted as a hook for me). I also loved that you included the pictures of the petpets. ^^ I know zilch about Altador petpets and it would be such a hassle to look up each petpet just to see how it really looked like. One thing: it would've been nicer if the images were centered and perhaps the names of the petpets could've been in bold. Of course, this has nothing to do with the content of the article. I'm just a bit nitpicky about organization and the article would've looked much neater that way. (Don't mind me. Obsessive-compulsive person coming through. ^^ On to the real review. That is, the content. ^^ You wrote a very nice first paragraph (that part about Meepits really hit home, you know? ). The descriptions were both fun and informative. There were even some parts that made me chuckle (I liked that you didn't try to be funny throughout the article - just some sprinkles of humor is good and you did that well). You have also successfully convinced me that the Alabriss is the perfect petpet for my currently petpetless Aubergine Chia, Chistomise. ^^ Good work! Looking forward to seeing more of your pieces in future Neopian Times issues. Yayy I'm so glad you like it I really appreciate the complete review. About the pictures, TNT added them for me ^^ Hehe. But I agree, if I had thought about adding pictures myself, it would have looked much neater centered and everything. Once again, glad you like it. I have a few things being held over for future issues so, if they get in, I hope you read them also. I'll do some reviews later =) |
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Post by nikki on Apr 7, 2006 23:42:21 GMT -5
The Skunk and the Teacher
This story was great! It kept my attention the entire way through. Like Dan said up there, I could sort of guess what was going to happen but I liked it. At least it had a nice plot and good description.
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Post by Kat on Apr 7, 2006 23:56:39 GMT -5
Ooh, I must do reviews. ^^;;;
But...anyone who can review part two of "Return of the Double Agent"? ^^;
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Post by Belle on Apr 8, 2006 0:09:35 GMT -5
New Series ReviewPlushie Eaters: Part One by literalluauWhoot! ^^ Congrats, Luau! I still remember this from the time you asked us to check it out at the NTAG but I'll try to review it. Let's see...Penelope is just so adorable. She's a very likeable protagonist (your characterization of her is excellent). That part where she sent her plushies away really made me "Awww..." as well as laugh. Despite her characterization, I still didn't expect that part (I wonder why). There isn't much I can say, really, but I promise to give a more in-depth review after I read the entire series. ^^
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Post by Someeeoneeeee on Apr 8, 2006 1:30:22 GMT -5
Reviews for "Fisher" (short story) are really appreciated |
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Post by Random Cameo Neotomi on Apr 8, 2006 5:23:07 GMT -5
Please review The Pet Patrol Revolution (Boy, it's ben a while since I said that) |
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Post by Huntress on Apr 8, 2006 5:24:03 GMT -5
Hehe, my comic is the first one in the list for the second week in a row :3 This time not that funny, but society critical *grim nod* Maybe TNT will notice that and do something about it. Anyway, yeah, reviews on my "Hard Times" comic are very much appreciated ^^
*pokes random people on this thread* Would anyone mind compiling teh List?
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Reviews coming up...
I'm so happy!!! My story title and custom pic is on the news page!!! I think I'm gonna cry...
neo username - dan4884 
Since I am an Aisha-lover, I couldn't help but read it. ^^;
