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Post by Nina on Dec 11, 2005 16:21:28 GMT -5
I'm sorry... ;__; What speed connection do you have? 'Cause if you're on 56k, it takes approx. 1 min, 15 secs. I don't have a loading sequence for my comics yet, so it may be loading even though it doesn't seem like it ... it's on my to-do list. I'm almost, done, I just have to muddle through the script behind it. >_<; Aww... I'm not annoyed. XD I was just upset with my dial-up (verra slow connection). Thanks for telling me though, I just thought it wasn't loading.  *goes back to try again* *ish still not loading after five minutes* Hmm, I'll check on one of the comps at school, but I'll be a few days late. Smelly Nelly
by i_hate_backstabbers;D Awesome comic; I was laughing all the way along at the way the characters were drawn and the things they said. I loved how she started the comic with the Kacheek's baby-talk; it really draws you in. What I especially liked (next to the poofeh fur at the end ^^), was the way the background was done. I really admire the way that most of the background is outlined just by normal shading. Makes it look smooth and pretty. EDIT: Any more reviews for "Why Blue Draik Eggs?" would be great.  Since it's my first comic, I'd love to know what I should change, and what was good. What an adorable comic! I'm personally not a big fan of animated comics, because I say that if they can be done in a normal comic format, you should do them that way. However, this one works very nicely, if I do say so myself ^_^. It would have been sort of difficult to illustrate without having it animated, so I understand why you made it so. I like the thought bubbles! It's nice that you really had no words in this comic, but showed everything in pictures instead. Very well-done ^_^. You're obviously very talented. There's no doubt about it. I think that your use of expressions, your overall pacing...it all shows it. The very first part, the beginning with the Shoyru? Very nicely done. I can see that happening in real life, and the expressions are priceless! Also, the Aisha with the bag? xD. HILARIOUS! I really like the rolling of the eyes. I'm not completely sure whether I understand the punchline. Is it that the Kadoatie receives too many Draik Eggs, and cannot eat them in the end? ^_^; The quality of the lines and the colours is not too great, but I know how difficult it can be to fit into the file size. I can tell just from the lines, the proportions, again, that you're very talented, and that you're a great artist. I would recommend that you, in the future, draw shorter comics, and I also recommend that you do still comics as opposed to animated ones. You'll find that you can then focus on punchlines better, and you'll be able to make it all look prettier, because file size won't be an issue. It's so obvious that you're a great artist! You want to show that off as much as you can, you know? ^_^. Very nice job, especially for a first comic! My first comic was awful, so in comparison yours shines . Congratulations on getting in, and thank you for your review of Smelly Nelly. |
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Post by Czenko on Dec 11, 2005 16:29:43 GMT -5
Thank you very much for the review. Captain Woodbeak is one of the main characters, and he does play a large role since he is the cause of nearly everything. Muahaha! I got a few neomails saying that they liked the ending. I wonder what's going to happen next *shifty eyes*
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Post by Czenko on Dec 11, 2005 16:43:13 GMT -5
Why blue draik eggs?
This comic was too cute! I loved the Kad. It took advantage of everybody, and soon nobody wanted to give draik eggs away. It was so CUTE! What an evil little kad, but it's so adorable.
I don't see how this would be done in classic comic form. It was done very well, and I liked how you didn't use any words. It makes it better that way.
I just have to say the comic was adorable as well as the pets that were in it.
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Post by Nina on Dec 11, 2005 16:45:55 GMT -5
Smelly Nelly by i_hate_backstabbers Ah yes Nina! Your comic really leans well up against mine The art is very detailed, smoothe and easy on the eyes - especially the candles and flowers. The shading is very atmospheric, and the 'puffy' Nelly in the last panel, simply cracks me up xD Yet again, Sis proves to be quite a scoundrel! The things you want to do to your brother, just to get a good laugh now and then *sigh* xD Thanks for helping me out with the story - I know I enjoyed doing this collaboration-thing with you. Great job Nina -hugs- Thank you for the comments, Ms. Leoness . I'm definitely enjoying this, as well. You're motivating me to keep my comics going, as lazy as I may get sometimes. [/u] Hehe, cute idea. I love the fluffyness. xD [/quote] Aw, thank you ^_^. |
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Post by Nut on Dec 11, 2005 19:08:58 GMT -5
I'm glad you like him. ^^ He follows Lulu everywhere (but not in the first comic, strangely), so... yeah. Thanks for the review, Tiger!
Thank you for the review, Leoness! ^^ You're right about the eyes. I was having a hard time making the eyes look right in the last two panels. I redrew the ones in the second-to-last panel, but left the last ones as they were because I didn't think they were so awkward, but I guess I was wrong. Thanks!
Thank you for the review, Choc. ^^
I must get reviews done this week. I meant to do so many more reviews last week. (I was very happy though--last week's Reviews thread spanned six pages! Yay!)
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Post by Lau on Dec 12, 2005 10:53:20 GMT -5
Karma Comes Around Hehe. I got: 6-9 Points: You have generally good karma. Good and bad things still happen to you, but mainly good things. Every time a bad thing comes along, don’t worry, many more good things are to come. Cute article; I liked the intermittent phrases of your own that you threw in, such as the one I quoted above. Usually I don't read very many articles, and out of those I barely ever see tests like that, so it was neat to try something different. Some of the questions were pretty straightforward, like Illusen VS Jhudora or donating to the money tree, but I liked the more obscure questions like backing Brian the Scorchio and Meepit VS Feepit (I really didn't know one was supposed to be good and the other bad!) The overall length of the article was good -- it was long enough to have substance without throwing in a lot of unnecessary fillers like so many seem to do. It was also short enough to keep the energy and engagement high, without lapsing into extra paragraphs that don't add much to the article as a whole. There was the colorful little introduction, the questions and short summaries, and the scoring guides. Just what was needed. Searching For Paradise: Part OneThe introduction of this first part was very well done -- concise, well-paced, and did a nice job of characterizing Tye the Ixi. Your sentence variation proved for smooth flow and transitions. I thought the part weakened slightly near the end, when Tye is arguing with her family. It just seems that rich people try to suppress their emotions, always following what is "proper" and "expected," so I think Tye's father would be much more reluctant to be bellowing at the top of his lungs like that than he was. Most snobbish upper-class people would look down on that behavior, considering it low or common. The sister's reaction here was good: I also thought that the part where Tye was picking at her salad and thinking of Allehya's search for trash was a good representation of her new way of thinking, and her new awareness for the less fortunate. I think this story looks as if it'll be pretty good... maybe a sort of Prince and the Pauper idea? I don't know. The Unraveling TruthThis is a neat interpretation of how the Lab Ray Scientist came to be. The general idea is good, that he was transformed by Sloth as punishment. However the problem with the story is its pacing. Parts of the plot seem extremely rushed, like you are hurrying to get to the next part. For example: It was apparent after I finished that passage that the Grundo hurried out to avoid Sloth's button. But maybe state that more clearly? As a reader, it's best to have much of the actions of the characters explained, through maybe a thought or a narration, rather than having to infer why the characters behave as they do. The pacing was also much too rapid in this passage: It sounds almost as if he came up with the ray in only a few days. You don't say how he experiments to perfect it, or how he comes up with it, or even clearly what his purpose in creating it is, besides "trying to please his master." What specifically about it would please Sloth? And was the room he appeared in just naturally equipped with chemicals, rays, and vials? This entire part could use a lot of expanding. The very end was good, though. I thought your ending sentence, had a good tone to it -- melancholy and distant.
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Post by Tiger on Dec 12, 2005 15:06:33 GMT -5
Searching For Paradise: Part OneThe introduction of this first part was very well done -- concise, well-paced, and did a nice job of characterizing Tye the Ixi. Your sentence variation proved for smooth flow and transitions. I thought the part weakened slightly near the end, when Tye is arguing with her family. It just seems that rich people try to suppress their emotions, always following what is "proper" and "expected," so I think Tye's father would be much more reluctant to be bellowing at the top of his lungs like that than he was. Most snobbish upper-class people would look down on that behavior, considering it low or common. The sister's reaction here was good: I also thought that the part where Tye was picking at her salad and thinking of Allehya's search for trash was a good representation of her new way of thinking, and her new awareness for the less fortunate. I think this story looks as if it'll be pretty good... maybe a sort of Prince and the Pauper idea? I don't know. Thanks for the review! Hm. That's a pretty good point about the yelling. I'm not really rich myself, so I wouldn't know. And I've heard that I didn't do as good a job there as I should've. *Sticks big EDIT sign in front of my computer* There Not really Prince and the Pauper. I concidered it, but I like what actually will happen better  |
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Post by Deleted on Dec 12, 2005 18:25:47 GMT -5
Searching For Paradise: Part One
This not Cpm's first series, an hopefully it won't be her last as she is certainly one of the more quality prolific writers in the new issue of the Neopian Times.
The story Searching For Paradise is a bout an alienated ixi who is disaillusioned with her luxerious life in Neopia Central. It is tightly written and all stylisitc points are where they should be.
However, I was dissapointed in this story. There are so many stories where rich=bad, mean or snotty. The author streotyped quite a lot of rich people as many Neopian Authors tend to do, as being snotty and out of touch with Neopia as it really is. I think that this is really the core reason why I didn't like this story.
In any story you need your characters too feel depth, it is integral about making us care about them, but in this character none of the supporting characters had any depth. They just were mindless villains whose only purpose seemed to be guide the ixi to whatever her destiny to be.
This weakened the story tremendously not only by making it less beleivable, but less complex, and less cliche. This story had a lot of potential but the characterzation just really wasn't to my taste.
I suppose if you like dry cut stories, than this might be the story for you. It is as per usual of Tiger extremely well written, and the dialouge and everything else is just so realistic. It is such a shame that the author's first part, by making seem things so cut and dry didn't make me want to read on. I hope that the second part will add some depth to the story.
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Post by Tiger on Dec 12, 2005 19:19:59 GMT -5
Searching For Paradise: Part One This not Cpm's first series, an hopefully it won't be her last as she is certainly one of the more quality prolific writers in the new issue of the Neopian Times. The story Searching For Paradise is a bout an alienated ixi who is disaillusioned with her luxerious life in Faerieland. It is tightly written and all stylisitc points are where they should be. However, I was dissapointed in this story. There are so many stories where rich=bad, mean or snotty. The author streotyped quite a lot of rich people as many Neopian Authors tend to do, as being snotty and out of touch with Neopia as it really is. I think that this is really the core reason why I didn't like this story. In any story you need your characters too feel depth, it is integral about making us care about them, but in this character none of the supporting characters had any depth. They just were mindless villains whose only purpose seemed to be guide the ixi to whatever her destiny to be. This weakened the story tremendously not only by making it less beleivable, but less complex, and less cliche. This story had a lot of potential but the characterzation just really wasn't to my taste. I suppose if you like dry cut stories, than this might be the story for you. It is as per usual of Tiger extremely well written, and the dialouge and everything else is just so realistic. It is such a shame that the author's first part, by making seem things so cut and dry didn't make me want to read on. I hope that the second part will add some depth to the story. Hm...I'm not sure whether to feel proud or mildly annoyed  Lots of people are assuming this is a Prince and the Pauper type story. It's not!! There's a huge thing coming that makes it more interesting, and it's not a simple trading of lives. Tye's family members aren't all that important to the story. There are two other characters coming who are, but I felt that the rest didn't need all that much character. I also kind of figured that having a really understanding rich family would mean that they would help Allehya, and then there would be no problem. I didn't really see another way it could have worked. And yes, everyone, I promise this becomes a far more unique story as it goes on!! ..Faerieland? Tye doesn't live in Faerieland. She's in neopia Central... |
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Post by Tam on Dec 12, 2005 19:20:54 GMT -5
Aww... I'm not annoyed. XD I was just upset with my dial-up (verra slow connection). Thanks for telling me though, I just thought it wasn't loading. *goes back to try again* *ish still not loading after five minutes* Hmm, I'll check on one of the comps at school, but I'll be a few days late. Smelly Nelly
by i_hate_backstabbers;D Awesome comic; I was laughing all the way along at the way the characters were drawn and the things they said. I loved how she started the comic with the Kacheek's baby-talk; it really draws you in. What I especially liked (next to the poofeh fur at the end ^^), was the way the background was done. I really admire the way that most of the background is outlined just by normal shading. Makes it look smooth and pretty. EDIT: Any more reviews for "Why Blue Draik Eggs?" would be great. Since it's my first comic, I'd love to know what I should change, and what was good. What an adorable comic! I'm personally not a big fan of animated comics, because I say that if they can be done in a normal comic format, you should do them that way. However, this one works very nicely, if I do say so myself ^_^. It would have been sort of difficult to illustrate without having it animated, so I understand why you made it so. I like the thought bubbles! It's nice that you really had no words in this comic, but showed everything in pictures instead. Very well-done ^_^. You're obviously very talented. There's no doubt about it. I think that your use of expressions, your overall pacing...it all shows it. The very first part, the beginning with the Shoyru? Very nicely done. I can see that happening in real life, and the expressions are priceless! Also, the Aisha with the bag? xD. HILARIOUS! I really like the rolling of the eyes. I'm not completely sure whether I understand the punchline. Is it that the Kadoatie receives too many Draik Eggs, and cannot eat them in the end? ^_^; The quality of the lines and the colours is not too great, but I know how difficult it can be to fit into the file size. I can tell just from the lines, the proportions, again, that you're very talented, and that you're a great artist. I would recommend that you, in the future, draw shorter comics, and I also recommend that you do still comics as opposed to animated ones. You'll find that you can then focus on punchlines better, and you'll be able to make it all look prettier, because file size won't be an issue. It's so obvious that you're a great artist! You want to show that off as much as you can, you know? ^_^. Very nice job, especially for a first comic! My first comic was awful, so in comparison yours shines . Congratulations on getting in, and thank you for your review of Smelly Nelly. Wow, thanks for the in-depth review! xD And you're entirely right -- I think that if you can make a comic, panel by panel and as a still image, then that's all the better for your end result. I'm not too talented with animating, but I'd had the initial idea for the plot in my head for a while and wanted to do something with it. A still just wouldn't work. Heh, all that stuff up there about my art, I feel so embarrassed... you know, I was pretty disappointed with the last panel's punchline too. It was intended to show, like Czenko said *bows*, the Kad having too many draik eggs to know what to do with, but I copped out on a decent punchline -- which was going to be all the eggs hatching into a mob of blue Draiks -- because I didn't want to put the time into drawing that scene. 9_9 *sigh* The draik eggs were easy enough to copy/paste every here and there... but draiks...? Ah well, my friend betazoid_telepath and I have come up with an idea for a still comic collab. |
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Post by Lau on Dec 12, 2005 21:40:16 GMT -5
How many parts is it in all, anyway?
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Post by Fj0rd on Dec 12, 2005 22:05:59 GMT -5
Ruling the UniverseHaha, I loved this article. It had a great and not-often-seen/seen-at-all theme, and I loved the pet narration and they way the article came to be. I didn't notice any grammatical errors, and the italics and bolds were a very nice touch, it added to the enjoyment of the article. The commentaries at the end of each chapter allowed us to get a feel for Yotaria's (I hope I spelled that right) personality, which is hard to do in an article. You also did a great job at making the chapters sound like Sloth himself wrote them. I will do some new series reviews later. I promise. Oh, and thank you to the two people that reviewed my article! Your names escape me right now, but I still thank you. Heh, thanks Apollo ^^ If anyone else wants a review, just poke me or something. If you want a continued series review, umm... I might not do it unless it's ending this week. But then again, I might. |
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Post by Dan on Dec 12, 2005 22:23:13 GMT -5
Ruling the UniverseHaha, I loved this article. It had a great and not-often-seen/seen-at-all theme, and I loved the pet narration and they way the article came to be. I didn't notice any grammatical errors, and the italics and bolds were a very nice touch, it added to the enjoyment of the article. The commentaries at the end of each chapter allowed us to get a feel for Yotaria's (I hope I spelled that right) personality, which is hard to do in an article. You also did a great job at making the chapters sound like Sloth himself wrote them. I will do some new series reviews later. I promise. Oh, and thank you to the two people that reviewed my article! Your names escape me right now, but I still thank you. Heh, thanks Apollo ^^ If anyone else wants a review, just poke me or something. If you want a continued series review, umm... I might not do it unless it's ending this week. But then again, I might. I have a series, "Sight" that's on Part 3 of 5. I don't want to guilt you into anything, but I thought I'd throw it out there anyways. |
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Post by ohmandoh on Dec 13, 2005 4:09:44 GMT -5
My first attempt at reviews! Since this is my first time reviewing... I was hoping that someone would review my reviews. Please tell me anything I'm doing anything wrong here. I have a few questions.
a) What is the purpose of this board? Is it to give feedback to the authors? Is it to tell other readers which ones to read?
b) Can you review anything you want in the times (as opposed to giving reviews only to those who request one here)?
c) Are bad reviews allowed here? (Not talking about cruelty, just saying something like 'this story was flat' or 'that comic was dull' etc.)
Comics
Island Babe and Friends: Potato Counter
At first, I couldn't tell what was happening with that girl's head. When I did figure it out, and finished the comic... I thought about it for a while, then laughed my head off. Just picturing that girl bend down and open wide... well, you'll see.
Squish!
A fun animation of something that happens to me just about every week. I'm glad that thing finally got squashed!
Spooky
It's a bit odd to be writing a review of my favorite comic series ever! I rank it up there with Garfield. Too bad I can't read Spooky every day. As always, the artist pays careful attention to detail. The backgrounds to the comics are almost as fun to look at as the characters. The expressions are perfect. And need I say it? Hilarious!
A Plus!
I laughed just because of the way it was made. Brings back memories of the grand stuffed animal productions my friends and I used to put on back in the day! Kinda' difficult to see and I never got the punchline, but for some reason, still funny!
The Misfortunes of Owning a Petpet
Took me a long time to "get" this one, too. The title helps. But it really was funny once I got it. Hehe.
grammer polease
Yes. Funny. One short story. Three punchlines. I especially like the last thing said... how it was said... what it said... and the whole I-can-see-what-shouldn't-be seen thing. Yeah.
Just Let Us Win the Jackpot!
LOL. I'm glad it wasn't about what I thought it would be about when I read the title. It also has some great crayon work, but you can see where it has been edited. Plus, I can't tell whether the words are hand-drawn or comp-drawn... which is good.
Qnde & Szoo: Illusen's Quest
Funny, but cruel! Nice PSA at the end.
Charm Series
Very funny. I especially like the word bubbles. Very bubbly.
Neopian Insanity
Great crayon artwork. Once I understood the order in which I was supposed to read the list (left to right, not columnal), not to mention that I had to read it at all (Naturally want to skip that part. I think it would have been better crayon drawn as well, with parchment backround like below.), I couldn't stop laughing. Neoquest lovers will definitely want to see this one. Oh, and I didn't notice the question marks as question marks.
Deja Vu
Strange on so many levels.
Why Blue Draik Eggs?
Kadoatery lovers will love this one. Great animation.
Maraquan Living
I want that avie! Hehe. Funny.
Shark Bait
Too funny. A poke at Adam and his asparagus obsession.
Mootix Madness - We Have a Winner Pt. 2
You know what? Smelly Nelly makes so much more sense now. Hehe.
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Post by Kushbi on Dec 13, 2005 5:07:17 GMT -5
My first attempt at reviews! Since this is my first time reviewing... I was hoping that someone would review my reviews. Please tell me anything I'm doing anything wrong here. I have a few questions. a) What is the purpose of this board? Is it to give feedback to the authors? Is it to tell other readers which ones to read? b) Can you review anything you want in the times (as opposed to giving reviews only to those who request one here)? c) Are bad reviews allowed here? (Not talking about cruelty, just saying something like 'this story was flat' or 'that comic was dull' etc.) a) Primarily to give feedback to authors. b) I suppose you can, but bear in mind that not all authors like to have their work publicly reviewed. My opinion is that we should stick to giving requested reviews. c) Of course, honest and constructive reviews, whether good or bad, are allowed. But please refer to this thread on how to phrase your reviews if you have criticism: ntwriters.proboards53.com/index.cgi?board=work&action=display&thread=1050873821 |
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*goes back to try again* *ish still not loading after five minutes* Hmm, I'll check on one of the comps at school, but I'll be a few days late.
Since it's my first comic, I'd love to know what I should change, and what was good.
neo username - dan4884 