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Post by Dice on May 10, 2006 18:31:47 GMT -5
My Latin teacher: OK, this is how you remember the tenses. Imperfect is yourselves. Perfect is me, your lord and master, Father Portella, and Darth Vader, and Spock.
Us: O___________O
Him: *goes to board, breaks chalk*
Us: Wow, really perfect!
Latin extra credit: Translate this into Latin 'Spock is talking to the god Apollo and he says 'Don't call me Spock, call me Spockie! Father Portella is a 10th degree ninja, and if we don't go bowling, he will give you karate chop!' (Ha,then he actually shows us how to translate it)
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Post by Deleted on May 10, 2006 19:28:01 GMT -5
Garland: Eww, Sean! You nasty. Stop digging for gold.
Sean: Well one day I'll be rich.
Everyone: EWWWW!!!
Alyssa: See Sean, this is why you don't have a girlfriend.
Me: Au contrare, dear Alyssa. Nor do you have a boyfriend.
Alyssa: Yeah, well neither do you!
Melissa: Um, Alyssa? She does have one.
Me: Yeah I do!
Alyssa: ...
Me: Alyssa, you just got served!
Melissa: *privately to me* I'm surprised why she doesn't at least a fake boyfriend, as she wears miniskirts everyday.
Me: She's a poser whore. ^-^
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Post by Retired Blub on May 11, 2006 0:56:03 GMT -5
*in class* Intercom: Lockdown, lockdown. Me: *gasp* Friend: OMG, Alex, it's a lockdown! Awesome!  Me: 0_o ----------------- *first ever class with new Math teacher* Mr. Dery: *f-word* I NEVER want to hear ANY of you utter that word. Do you understand me? Students:... |
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Post by estantia on May 14, 2006 12:53:08 GMT -5
*in maths HIGHER class*
simon: I can't see why I'm getting the wrong answer!
me: let me see...
simon: go on then... *shoves over work*
me: Simon, what's 3 * 2?
Simon: *looks at work and eyes widen, 8???
Me: I guess that's the problem then...
*after a minute simon looks over* er.... lizzie?
me: yes?
simon: what's 4 * 2?
me: er... it's 6... obviously.... *shifty eyes*
*another minute later*
Me: oh for the love of...! 3*2 is not 8!
Simon: why are we in this class??
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Post by kittygirl on May 14, 2006 13:40:09 GMT -5
*man gives a girl a lei* Boy: She got leied! Man: That is not how I put it! (Leied, Laid say it outloud. its a pun) We were on a camping trip to a military school. The students were called Cadets. Girl: You're so cool! Do you have a facebook? Cadet: .... Yes. Girls: OMG I'm so going to Facebook you! Same camping trip we were all standing in rows for a cerimony: *boy throws up* *another boy passes out* *the boy next to him passes out* Everyone:  Cadet: If you feel like you're going to pass out please feel free to sit down. Cadet: And all you have to do is push this vein and the person will pass out. If you leave it there for over 15 seconds they will have permanent brain damage. Girl: Wow, cool can you show us! Cadet: o_0 .... no.... |
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Post by Psycho on May 14, 2006 15:04:42 GMT -5
Boy #1: Was it you who tried to snort pop rocks?
Boy #2: Yeah. My nose started bleeding and I had a headache for hours.
the "smart" kids at Columbia University, a "prestigious" American school xD
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Post by fipples~ on May 15, 2006 11:57:38 GMT -5
During a talk at school about the society, name-calling (which is worse, being name-called by a friend or a stranger, etc) and stuff like that. Kid from class: ... So what if someone calls me a son of a [rhymes with witch and it's censored, I think  ]? I know my mom is a lawyer! It took a second or two, but then it just got everyone laughing. |
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Post by Speck on May 15, 2006 12:04:51 GMT -5
So, I was making fake cigarettes for a one act that my school's drama department was putting on. (Last Thursday and Friday.) Me: Hey, Kevin! You want to help me roll cigarettes? Kevin: *runs away* Also, when we were still in our film unit for my literature class, the teacher would ask us if we recommended any movies. Jeff: I hated V for Vendetta. I didn't understand it! Mark/Kai: That's because you have to think to understand it. |
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Post by Deleted on May 15, 2006 15:06:14 GMT -5
So, when Jessica laughs, she waaaay overexaggerates and she rocks back and forth, clapping her hands, laughing like a hyena. So today, I made a wise-crack about her laugh because she almost hit her head on her desk. Me: Jessica, one of these you're going to hit your head when you're laughing. Jessica: Oh no, I've already done that before. Me: Oh yes, I can see that.  Garland: Ooooh, Jessica! You got dissed! Melissa: XDDD Good one, Sammy. Sammy: Yay. I t'was funnyish. |
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Post by Elcie on May 16, 2006 18:22:53 GMT -5
Julia: We should put up a site with all the answers to all the tests, call it "(my school name) Freshman Year Made Easy!" and charge...
Dale: Yes! Then we'd get rich!
Julia: Of course, then we'd probably get stoned...
Me, Tyler, and Dale: O___o;
Julia: ^^; I know there's more than one way you can take that, buuut...
Me: XD Oh! You meant like throwing stones at us? I didn't even think of that, I was thinking you meant drugs...
Julia: XDDD yes, we're all going to become rich druggies.
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Post by Fj0rd on May 17, 2006 15:43:01 GMT -5
Random guy: Are there moons around the sun? What if we were a moon around the sun...
CJ: I am talking vivaciously!
Isaac: I live in a swamp! And it's beautiful!
(don't ask. XD)
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Post by william on May 24, 2006 13:31:49 GMT -5
Loads of technical nerd quotes. On the bus, Pike was listening to his CD Walkman. Me: Woah, cool MP3 player, how many songs does it hold? Pike: .... Tom: It must be like, thirty! Me: Wooooow! XD My uncle-sorta-kinda was trying to fix my aunt's....*shudder* Mac... Paul (uncle): Well, this is quite an old version. The newer Macs have names like, ''Puma'', or ''Tiger'' or something. Me: What's this one? Paul: Sabre-toothed cat? XD And I went round to my grandma's, and I impressed her with wiring up the TV so the sound came through the music centre speakers, and other stuff...But then she had to tell me how to play an audio-cassette XD Me: *tries to put in tape* *phails* Arg, why doesn't it work?! Grandma: You have to press that button, and it'll give you a tray to put it in. Me: *does that* *tray slides in, tape gets stuck* Nah! Grandma: No, the thin end goes in first. *tries not to laugh* XD What do I know about cassettes? I've never used them XD |
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Post by spiritwolfforever on May 24, 2006 14:21:47 GMT -5
We were trying to make a guy in our group angry 'cuz we needed him to look angry for a photo...only problem is he's waayyy to mellow...
Person 1: Mark, you're failing school! Your trash!
Mark: Yay!
Person 2: Mark, your mom's fat.
Mark: Yeah, she kind of is...
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Post by Deleted on May 24, 2006 16:39:27 GMT -5
At opera. Where else? XD
Me: [line] "I'm not scared of you, you big swellhead! And I'm going up the river!"
Delores: [line] "What a bunch of jerks!"
Miss Collins: [stage director] That's such an awkward line. Can we change it?
Maestro: How about... "What a bunch of swellheads!"
We were laughing a long time at that one. Hah hah, 1920s lingo... xD
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Post by bag on May 24, 2006 18:18:20 GMT -5
Cousin: My head itches Me: Then scratch it! I just found this funny. |
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]? I know my mom is a lawyer!
