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Post by June Scarlet on Jul 4, 2022 10:01:48 GMT -5
I am writing an article for the Neopian Times called "Committee of Normalcy in Neovia Meeting Minutes," which despite the dry-sounding name, I'm trying to make as interesting as possible. It's the latest entry in the Saskori Saga. It's the official notes of the last meeting of the Committee of Normalcy in Neovia, which was attended, among others, by Saskori.
Because it's written like official meeting minutes, background characters need names for places like the roll call, and seconding motions, and stuff like that. This is where other Neovian characters come in.
I'm looking to borrow the at least the names of your Neovian Characters. I need at least four, though I'll always take more. Here's the roll call so far:
If you're interested, post or contact me directly. I can always make up names for the positions if no one volunteers, but I thought this would be a fun way to round things out. Credit will be given to you if I use your character. Thank you!
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Post by Liou on Jul 4, 2022 14:35:59 GMT -5
Hehe, this seems fun! Aw, I wish I could help, if only I had original charactersWAAIITAMINUTE, I DO??!
I once scrambled up a series set in Neovia, centered around all the cults and clubs and societies that meet in the various Vaults - like a big, dramatic underground community center.
Lady Adeline Eaves is the owner, legally and through ancient magical law, of the Vaults. She is the rich benefactor type, a vampire Gelert, and basically a Morticia Addams expy. (She is close with a vampire Cybunny called Natalie and I was half-setting up vampire shippy stuff for the future >>)
Pamela Hayward the Acara is a young cult member who's just in this to play with Petpets - in this case, the Gelatinous Non-Cube. She needs more of a social life.
Penelope "Aunt Penny" "Penny-for-your-thoughts" Bronsten is a kindly older Elephante, who is known for her ability to converse with spirits, which in Neovia just means saying hello and making polite small talk when you come across the many local ghosts. She's just an observant Miss Marple type.
Gustave Cheltenham is a serious bemonocled Quiggle, partner in a construction firm. In charge of being anxious and reasonable. Hardly appears, but more of a blank slate for grabs.
They are all involved in at least one underground society. Any of these could be roped into Committee business, even if just for one meeting to replace someone else, grab -and change- if you wish~
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Post by June Scarlet on Jul 4, 2022 20:17:34 GMT -5
Ah! Thank you Liou! I (finally) read All hat, no dragon, and it was a lot of fun, except for the one confusing bit in the first part where the editor randomly threw in the text of another story at the end, not that it was your fault, but maybe have the editor look into fixing that.
Talking with Kat, I feel I need to clear up a few more things that may affect which characters people want me to use. The Committee of Normalcy in Neovia (CONIN) is well named, because Mona Hallow is literally conning everyone on it. The basic plans is to raise funds and run off with the Neopoints. She's doing this by playing on some Neovian's fear and distrust of ghosts and monsters and the like. It's pretty unsavory, though those on the committee think they're doing good trying to make Neovia normal.
So, for example, I could use Liou's character Penelope Bronsten, but she would be out of character because I doubt she'd support this committee's actions. Or maybe I could use her as a guest who's there precisely because she disagrees with them. A ghost would be tricky because the committee resents them and it's hard to mask being a ghost. Whereas a vampire could be on the committee if they were disguised as a normal Neopian.
I'm probably overthinking things, as these are just background characters, but I still want them to act in character, or at least, make sure the author is okay with it.
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Post by June Scarlet on Jan 9, 2023 21:28:11 GMT -5
Hi, yes, I haven't worked on this in about six months, but I did work on it, and I'm picking it up again now. The problem is, I've forgotten who one of the characters belong to.
The roster I have is as follows:
I don't remember who Clancy Geyer belongs to, though. Maybe even a name I made up myself to fill in that spot.
If you recognize this character, please let me know. I'm sorry.
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Post by June Scarlet on Jan 10, 2023 23:28:06 GMT -5
I've finished my article draft! Committee of Normalcy in Neovia Meeting Minutes is complete.
Now I'm looking for a Beta Reader or two. Let me know if you're interested!
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Post by Twillie on Jan 11, 2023 1:44:07 GMT -5
I can beta read it!
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Post by June Scarlet on May 11, 2023 13:20:53 GMT -5
Hey, remember this article? It's finished and posted here: ntwriters.proboards.com/post/2745059/threadBut it's not yet published. I've submitted it three times so far, and I'd like to get it published before the next story in the series, which I'll be submitting for the Underground collab end of July. I'm looking for Beta Reader(s), but preferably one who isn't familiar with my Saskori Saga. Since the editor hasn't read the backlog either. So if you haven't read these stories, but you're interested in helping, please let me know! Alternatively, help me think of a way to shoehorn it into Fyora or Petpet theme days. |
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Post by Liou on May 11, 2023 15:12:42 GMT -5
Oh huh, submitted three times? Well I'm the original Saskori fan but I'll give this article a tad more thought. I guess that for those who aren't familiar with the series, the minutes format might be a bit more difficult to get into. Maybe it needs a prologue similar to stories that claim to be actual documents unearthed in mysterious circumstances and published by a third party?
Tangentially, I'd be curious to know Saskori's more personal thoughts on CONIN based on her experience from The Normal. =O
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Post by June Scarlet on May 11, 2023 16:56:03 GMT -5
Yeah, that's a good thought Liou, I was wondering if maybe it needed a prologue of sorts to draw in readers better.
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Post by Gelquie on May 11, 2023 21:00:20 GMT -5
I gave the CONIN Meeting Minutes a read-over! Not really being familiar with your series, I might be able to offer some perspective.
From someone who's just going in, who knows nothing of the Saskori saga, a part of me is going over the old meeting notes at the beginning and going "why do I care about the meeting minutes of a meeting for a group I don't know?", which makes me more likely to skim it. Especially when it starts with treasury stuff. It's later as I go on that I realize what the thesis of the piece is; that is, setting up Saskori's position in the meeting and later showing her horror at the priorities of the group, and the scandal that follows. I think the last part is portrayed effectively for that. After finishing and for a re-read, the beginning of the meeting minutes is more likely to draw me for more details, but I don't feel that should take a re-read, and it still feels a little slow to get there. This makes the beginning of the meeting minutes make more sense upon re-read, but it still feels slow to get to the topic.
I think Liou has a good idea that maybe it needs a prologue, or something, to help set up the meeting, or maybe as a glance-back on how the meeting went wrong. Sort of like a document to support a story within a story? And potentially covering what Saskori will do after she left the meeting and found the minutes, and what she plans next. As Liou said, some of Saskori's thoughts (and lead-ins to action) after the fact.
It doesn't have to be exactly like that. Just a way to strengthen the hook to make the reader want to read the meeting minutes. Such as if there's word of the meeting going wrong or some scandal, and people want to find out what happened. Or if CONIN has this vibe that feels off, and someone finds the meeting minutes to help pin down why. I guess it's like setting up some sort of narrative structure around the meeting minutes themselves?
Or maybe this is part of an entry in Saskori's diary, where she's talking about it and her thoughts, and she pasted in the meeting minutes for posterity. This could keep it to article format, perhaps?
Dunno; just some ideas!
A few other things came to mind, but they're a bit more to my personal tastes, and I don't think they're affecting whether your article is ultimately published or not, so I'll stick to this for now.
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Post by June Scarlet on May 11, 2023 21:41:14 GMT -5
Thank you for stepping up, Gelquie!
Those are some good points. I think when I wrote the article, part of it was for the challenge of trying to tell a story in such a strict format. Meeting minutes have a certain way they go, and tend to be rather dry. Could I do it?
I wouldn't say I was completely unsuccessful, it gets there in the end, but that beginning is hard to get through, and it's not published, of course.
I think to get it published though, I'll have to rethink the beginning. I think having some sort of bookends or at least a prologue lead-in will help a lot, indeed. That's not an idea I had when I wrote the piece, for sure.
I'm about ready for bed, so I will think on these thoughts from the both of you some more, and get back to you.
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Post by June Scarlet on May 15, 2023 20:47:03 GMT -5
And there it is, the third rejection. I will try again for end of June/July, after the two back-to-back themed issues. That'll give me some time to incorporate this good feedback.
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Post by June Scarlet on May 19, 2023 10:35:38 GMT -5
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Post by Lex on May 20, 2023 16:45:25 GMT -5
I read the original earlier and felt like the feedback you'd gotten was better than what I could offer, so I'm circling back to this now. Just read the updated version and wanted to comment that I think the added context of the opening letters does a perfect job of setting up the reader. I think its especially helpful for people who aren't familiar with the format (not that it would be difficult to infer, but clarifying up front that something of interest has already happened does serve as a better hook); the clarification sets an expectation without spoiling the payout of reading through the minutes.
Good luck and I hope this is the push it needed to be accepted!
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Post by June Scarlet on Jun 18, 2023 19:21:31 GMT -5
Okay, time to try again!
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