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Post by Kathleen on Nov 5, 2010 22:08:36 GMT -5
Aw, it is a scene of adorableness. <3
... the bit about the shadows makes me really want to draw Xochie. I wonder why I always want to draw other people's characters. Huh. xD
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Post by Rikku on Nov 5, 2010 22:22:11 GMT -5
Aw, it is a scene of adorableness. <3 ... the bit about the shadows makes me really want to draw Xochie. I wonder why I always want to draw other people's characters. Huh. xD =D I would have not the slightest protest to you drawing Xochie. At all. Not even a bit. |
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Post by Trilly (18426 words) on Nov 6, 2010 2:23:17 GMT -5
Very, very shiny snippet. =D You make me want to read this story in its entirety so much. From what I've seen so far, Xoriff is love. <3 Especially while Riff gets to be so easily embarrassed and in denial over it. In fair warning, it's a bloody weird story. xD Really. =D That is good! I woulda liked to hang on to the funness of that being-in-denial thing but Riff's not really the sort to ignore things for that long once his attention's been drawn to them - but once he figures out he does like Xochie, it's fun in a different sort of way? There's all sorts of awkward moments when he fails at telling him, I think. It'll be awesome. Oh, yes. ^__^ That is still fun indeed. Hey, even if the "denial" bit is fun, it's also always a good thing to advance potential relationships. I've only ever done this... twice. Ouchies. Not very well either. Awkward moments are also great, though. And since they are so shippery already, it'll be nice to see that potential going along in the right direction.  |
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Post by Rikku on Nov 8, 2010 19:38:03 GMT -5
Haha! I've finished school! =D Now I have nothing but Prizegiving tonight (which is an excuse to sort of wear a suit so all is good) and then exam leave and then exams and then a vast summer full of cello and writing and (predominantly) being bored! Life is good. Have a kraken. ... I'm really entirely too fond of the word 'blubberous'. Two weeks passed. Nothing interesting happened, though occasionally there were sea monsters.
“Get out here!” Olly roared at him, glaring furiously. “What are you doing?”
Hush stood, screwed shut the inkbottle, carefully placed the ledger he’d been writing in inside a drawer. “Inventory is important,” he said irritably, picking up his cudgel.
Olly, who had been standing impatiently outside his door as though only barely restraining himself from entering and throwing Hush around a little, gave a grunt of exasperation and strode off down the corridor in a swish of coat. “Is now really the time?” he said, drawing a dagger.
Hush waited until he’d climbed the ladder before he scaled it, because two people climbing a ladder at once wasn’t safe; if one of them lost his balance they’d both fall, and if the one that lost his balance happened to be carrying an unsheathed weapon at the time … “If you ignore inventory,” he said, “goods’ll just pile up. Do you realise that in your storerooms you have—” He emerged on deck, closing his eyes then opening them as he came out in the sunlight. The deck was strewn with loose cargo, swearing crewmen and large blubberous chunks of flesh that dripped slime. There was a massive kraken-type beast wrapped around part of the ship, flailing its tentacles and hissing acid. Hush surveyed this and then continued without pausing, “—stolen goods from up to three years ago? If you’d stolen perishables, they’d be naught but dust by now.”
“I don’t steal perishables!” shouted Olly, drawing his scimitar – he’d lost his rapier to a sea serpent a week ago – and diving forward to slash at a spiked tentacle that was pinning one of his crewmen to the deck. “Who’d steal perishables? No bloody point!”
“On my old ship,” Hush said, and then started again, because he could tell by Olly’s look of incomprehension that he hadn’t spoken loudly enough to be heard over the screaming and spitting-of-acid and such. “On my old ship,” he shouted, resenting the need for loudness, “we often stole some of the finer-quality foods! They sold well if you could come into port within a week or so of stealing them, and if not, a crew can always use more food!”
“Hear hear!” said the crewman who Olly was rescuing, enthusiastically. Olly glared at him and darted over to stare dramatically at the kraken, leaving the crewman pinned beneath a tentacle that was only half chopped through.
“I spoil this lot too much already!” Olly shouted, seemingly at the kraken. It blinked its large moist eye at him, looking confused. Olly grinned and darted forward to stab at the eye, but the kraken flailed a tentacle at him and tossed him back across the deck, skittering into Hush. His scimitar skidded across the deck, ending up quite near the enthusiastic crewman, who showed an enterprising nature by seizing it and chopping at the tentacle himself.
“You think that having a healthy crew is spoiling them? I’d call it a necessity,” Hush said, offering his hand.
Olly took it and shouted dramatically, “Who’s Captain on this—”
“You don’t need to shout. I’m standing right here."
“—ship?!” Olly finished, at the same level of volume, and he turned around and breathed a jet of fire at the kraken. The kraken screeched and tossed one of his crewmen overboard. “Now, that just isn’t fair,” Olly said dejectedly.
Hush shrugged. “We can probably save him later.”
“No, I mean, that crewman who stole my scimitar managed to get a decent stab in - over there, see? If I’d done that I’d probably have to dodge lots of acid and do flips and nearly die.”
“Well, you are Captain on this ship,” Hush pointed out, and slammed his cudgel into a tentacle that was sliding up sneakily to try and grab Olly by the ankle. “Speaking of which. Do you really not realise the importance of good accounts? Keeping track of your wealth is a good way not to lose it.”
Olly glowered at him. “I think I’d rather talk to the kraken than you!” he said irritably, and grabbed a passing rope, swinging from it to land on the kraken’s head. It jerked its head sharply, trying to get at him, but Olly danced back and forth nimbly to keep his balance, and then let a blast of fire right onto its eye, and then stomped on it for good measure. The kraken keened in agony, grabbed him in a tentacle, flung him so he cracked hard against the mast and then spat acid at him.
Olly rolled over so the acid splattered, steaming, on his coat. “Well,” he said, giving Hush a pointed glare. “At least it didn’t talk about inventories.” |
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Post by Amneiger on Nov 9, 2010 2:55:37 GMT -5
*takes a kraken =D*
...
...So what do I feed this thing? =D
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Post by Rikku on Nov 9, 2010 17:44:40 GMT -5
Acid! =D Obviously. Or irritating crewmen, take your pick.
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Post by Rikku on Nov 10, 2010 18:41:08 GMT -5
42,00th word: 'said'. ... I can't help finding that kinda anticlimactic. xD This scene was really fun to write! ^___^ There's 3k or so of it, and I wrote it all today and it worked. It's pretty much Riff's only solo scene, and he gets to be awesome. I shall see if there's any excerpt-worthy bits. Hang on. “Oh no!” he cried out suddenly, and a juggling ball shot out of his hands. The audience drew in breath sharply, and he nimbly extended his foot and hit the ball at just the right angle to send it bouncing back into his hands. He gave a huge relieved grin, and then another ball shot out of his hands. He widened his eyes comically and kicked that back up as well … and it hit him in the face and squished messily, being the tomato.
He dropped all the other balls as well, though in such a way that they all rolled over to where the juggler sat. He stood there blinking, tomato dripping off his face. “Oops?” he offered eventually, and the audience broke out laughing.
This was so much fun!
“Anyone have a towel?” he asked hopefully, and someone flung a towel at him with vigour. He swayed backwards when it hit, and got a chuckle or two. “Yes, yes,” he said tiredly, “I know, I should know where my towel is,” and he wiped tomato from his face. “Sir or ma’am – sir! I am most obliged to you!” He gave an extravagant bow and tossed the towel back. “This is my first time entertaining, y’see. And,” he added, “yeah, I say that to all the audiences. I should be ashamed.”
More amusement. This was fun! This was so very very fun! And it was so easy! |
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Post by Amneiger on Nov 11, 2010 1:44:41 GMT -5
...Explaining those last few lines would probably spoil it, wouldn't it? xD
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Post by Rikku on Nov 11, 2010 17:14:14 GMT -5
...Explaining those last few lines would probably spoil it, wouldn't it? xD Um. D: What's confusing? I thought the context might be a little unclear (Riff's at his aunt's inn, he's trying to get some peach wine for Xochie 'cos Xochie likes peach wine and for a few other reasons, his aunt said he'd have to work for it and she meant mopping tables or something like that but he decided on a whim that entertaining might be more fun), but confusing isn't what I was going for at all! I tried to pick a snippet that was fairly self-evident. Gah. |
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Post by Amneiger on Nov 11, 2010 19:40:03 GMT -5
xD I understand it (it's easy for Riff to do and easy for the audience to be entertained by), but I also thought it might be some kind of NaNo joke (this excerpt got me words when I was stuck because it was fun and easy to write). xD
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Post by Rikku on Nov 11, 2010 19:45:04 GMT -5
xD I understand it (it's easy for Riff to do and easy for the audience to be entertained by), but I also thought it might be some kind of NaNo joke (this excerpt got me words when I was stuck because it was fun and easy to write). xD Not a NaNo-joke, no. Actually, this scene was quite slow to write (though fun, certainly), and I wasn't stuck, I'd been planning for Riff to do something of the sort from more or less the start. =D Um, but it would be cool if it was? And that impression would be easy to get, the narration's all bouncy and enthusiastic 'cos Riff is. So okay, good. 'm not all confuzzled now. xD |
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Post by Amneiger on Nov 15, 2010 3:14:01 GMT -5
I just noticed from the NaNo site that you hit 50k =D Congratulations!
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Post by Rikku on Nov 15, 2010 14:43:02 GMT -5
^_^ Thank you!
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Post by Trilly (18426 words) on Nov 15, 2010 18:13:42 GMT -5
Oh, ditto on the congrats from me! ^^ How long are you aiming to make it?
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Post by Tam on Nov 15, 2010 18:33:46 GMT -5
I just saw that too! =D Congratulations! Yay for 'Teeth! (And for the record, any story that can be nicknamed "'Teeth" is certain to be a good one, in my mind.)
...What was your 50 000th word? xD; ... Mostly because now that Shade's started keeping track of stuff like that in her story, I'm curious about everyone else's.
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