Double Magical Contracts - Shino and Cat Assassin

[Ikkin]

We've gotten two contracts now. =3 (Read: Ikkin was lazy and is trying to make up for it)

Cat Assassin asks:

Help! Suddenly my fur is infested with rainbow-colored beetles! I couldn't move!

And Shino asks:

I need help! Okay...not that kind of help, but you know...

I need to escape all the girls/women/females that keep asking for my picture, autograph, boxers, etc.! Please help me survive this beautiful entourage which usually includes NSQ, Rider, Xiv, Lady Christine, & Kat. But, please let me keep my rugged good looks. ^__^

ThankyouandIgottogobecausetheirrightbehindmeseeya!!!

These will be judged separately, so if you don't win one, you could win the other. ^^

They're both due on June 7th.

We need some more participation... come on, people.

***

Pending requests:

• Cat Assassin's fur problem (due June 7th)
  
• Shino's nonexistent girl troubles (due June 7th)

Finished requests:

• Mr. A's Love Trouble (Solution due by May 20th)Goosh's Magical Mischief-maker Problem (Solution due by May 22nd)
  
• Zari's Giant Cat Problem (Solution due by May 28th)

[Surf]

Shino:

Ooh ooh
I have an idea! Freeze the fangirls and throw them to the bottom of the ocean!

Okay, that was me being silly. You could try to create an illusion of yourself and hide whilst the illusion leads them at a safe distace away from you. Or flash them with a bright light, blinding them, and flee to safety.

[Salah~]

Cat Assassin:

The simplest method would be to static shock your fur a couple times with a very weak lightning spell. That should chase those critters out of your fur for good.

If you'd rather not use that method, you could try using telepathy to speak with the beetles. (I know you have telepathy. How else could you have contacted us without moving?) Explain to them as gently as you can that, although you have nothing against beetles, their presence is a bit of an inconvenience. Try to throw in a couple compliments. You don't want them to start biting you as well.

Another option is to go to a nice forest with plenty of wet leaves on the ground, and lie down or lean against a tree so the beetles have somewhere to go. (I'd try not to crush them if I were you. Rainbow beetles sound rare, and if you think live beetles are bad, imagine what it's like to have squished dead beetles in your fur. Ick.) If all goes well, they'll decide that the environment around you is preferable to your fur and leave you alone.

Shino:

Go to the nearest magic store you can find and get yourself the cheapest book on potions you can find. Make the love potion, and find some way of giving it to all of your admirers. Providing that you got a suitably deficient potion book, one dosage of the potion should be enough to destroy every trace of their affection for you.

[Kat]

Cat Assassin -

Seeing that you're dealing with beetles that are of an unnatural color (for their kind), if I were you I would consider reaching for the nearest encyclopedia of magical/mythical creatures. There should be one in the nearest library or in your own bookshelf, but if you don't have one in your home and/or the beetles tend to fall off or escape (which could cause a huge catastrophe - pun not intended - if they were allowed to roam around freely), make a house call. Get a specialist. Make sure they specialize in cats, since you're one. XD

No specialist? Nothing in the magical encyclopedias? Whip up something sweet. Anything sweet, but not necessarily magical. Insects are attracted to sweet things, and they'll definitely ditch your fur for some of that. To make it more effective, try not to overload on the soaps and the perfumes for a while so whatever you're creating will really attract the beetles. Then set a trap for them, be it an old-fashioned box or a magical one, and find a magical creature expert or at the very least, someone who's good with potions and magic concoctions. Rainbow beetles could probably be the next panacea or the next pet fad. And they could tell you what to do to avoid them in the future

The sweet stuff doesn't work? Water, and lots of it. Get yourself wet till every last beetle slips off your fur. Best if done in a tub. And scrub really well, especially behind those hard-to-reach places until those beetles are floating upside down in the water. XDDDD Then follow the last step of the above solution.

Shino -

I resent that! XD I propose commitment! Commit yourself to one girl so the rest would quit chasing you! XDDDDDD

If you really want them out of your hair, consider learning how to make lifelike, animated dummies. Make one, as much as possible, more handsome than you ever were (WARNING: May cause bruising of ego), and make another one like yourself.

Set your lookalike loose and let the fangirls chase it. Then have it return to you so you can release the second one. This one should be especially spelled so that it lasts for a while and leads the girls on a rather merry chase far, far away from you before the magic dies. At the very least, it can give you several moments of peace and quiet, and unless you end up staying up too late and getting dark circles under your eyes, it won't harm your devilishly good looks. XDDDDD

WARNING: Using this solution against me will never work - I was the one who proposed it! Now I'll have you all to myself! MWAHAHAHA! >=D

[evie]

Cat Assasain:

There's only on thing these beetles can be.......arctic rainbow circus beetles!!!! That's right, arctic rainbow circus beetles. They're quite rare. So make them work with you!!! Train your beetle like a flea circus and MAKE YOUR MILLIONS!! Warning: TThey need to be in a sealed enviorment or they'll freeze everything!!! Of course, you don't have to but it's a suggestion.

The way to get the beetles off is to go down to your local shop and get a packet salt and vinegar crisps ( HAVE TO be salt and vinegar. That's the only kind they like) and lure them off. Also, cookies work too. You could also sell them off to the Diagon alley pet shop (I'm sure they'd like rainbow beetles)..........I also heard they taste like chicken when fried ^^

Shino:

Find your fan girls a new distraction!!!! Make an Orlando Bloom Dummy and throw it in a plastic ball pit! You'll never see them again.........

Or, here's your second alternative. Buy a huge tub of transmoprhigation potion (or I'm sure one of the potion brewing mageswill be taken by your looks and just give you some) and turn into a MUTANT SQUID whenever they come along XD

Or the easiet thing to do would probably be to go down to Diagon Alley and buy an invisibility cloak.

[Omni]

Shino:
The answer is simple really. If you want to avoid fangirls without changing yourself, just get an invisibility cloak! The tricky part would be keeping from bumping into anybody. In by chance you do, don't say anything, or you'll have to hope that they don't recognize your voice.

((...Evie! You stole my idea!))


CA:
Just rinse your fur with bleach. It will strip those beetles of their colors. Rainbow beetles are very self-conscience, so once they no longer have their colors they will run off to hide, crying. And TA-DA! No more rainbow beetles!

[Deleted]

CA: Rainbow beetles? Psh. Easy! Just get a small dragon (I have one you can borrow if you take it off my hands for a week) to devour them. Rainbow beetles are the ultimate delicacy.
Of course, you may have a little trouble with burnt food for a while, but it’s better than rainbow beetles in your fur. Right?
Shino: I’m afraid you can’t completely get rid of them all unless you get rid of those (debatable) rugged good looks. You can get rid of most of them by casting an illusion to disguise those looks with a combination of a mutant Moehog’s face and a teenage witch (i.e. with lots of warts and such), and letting me get pictures to post everywhere. This serves a double purpose—the first being to deter fangirls, and the second to capture that amusing image for all of eternity.

[Ginz ❤]

Dear Cat Assasin:

I think rainbows are lovely. After getting rid of those rainbow-colored bettles, I think you should seriously consider dying your fur rainbowy. Now that's stylish! But anyway! First things first. Since you said you couldn't move, I think there's a possibility that those bettles are magical. They could have bitten you, injecting paralizing venom on you. But don't be scared! We mages are good at antidotes. The main ingredient will have to be some dully grey-colored beetles. Those are the exact opposite of the stylish rainbow-colored bettles, wouldn't you agree? The rest of the ingredients are a secret, because Mages don't revel their secrets. *shifty eyes*
You just need to drink the potion and then take a bath in dully grey water, using dully grey soap. That will scare them away! =D

- Ginz the Gentle

P.S. You might want to take another bath later, because I don't imagine dully greay water and soap will clean you up very well. >.>


Dear Shino:

I think you should become a vampire. =3 What? Vampires are cool! And you get to keep your looks! Only... with paler skin, maybe. >_>
You know how vampires don't reflect on mirrors? Well, that makes me think it's impossible to photograph them. ^_^ No one will be able to ask for you picture! Besides, you'd sleep all day and wake up at night, which will make it impossible for them to keep up with your schedule! Even if they do, one of the advantages of the night is the darkness, which can help you escape easily! And as a vampire, you can turn into your bat form and FLY AWAY! =D Isn't that so awesome? They'll probabl be so scared that you'll suck their blood that they won't bother you anyway.
You asked help to survive, and you know what? Vampires are undead creatures... you won't have to worry about living and dying anymore! =D
Not sure if that's what you wanted, but think about it. It solves all your problems! XD

- Ginz the Gentle

[Ginz ❤]

ikkinwithattitude said:

Okay, brick me if I forget this again. ._.

It's too soon to do that, but can I give you a gentle nudge? ^_^

*gentle nudge*

[Ikkin]

imogenweasley said:

ikkinwithattitude said:

Okay, brick me if I forget this again. ._.

It's too soon to do that, but can I give you a gentle nudge? ^_^

*gentle nudge*

Thanks, Ginz. ^_^

Okay, for CA's problem...
- Evie wins 250 CP for creativity.
- Salah wins 250 CP for effectiveness.
- Kat, Omni, Michelle, and Ginz earn 100 CP each.

For Shino's problem...
- Michelle wins 250 CP for creativity.
- Ginz wins 250 CP for effectiveness.
- Surf, Salah, Kat, Evie, and Omni earn 100 CP each.

[evie]

Whoah really? O.o WOOH! I hope those work out well for you, Shino and Cat Assasain.

And taylin, how'd I steal your idea? I'd never spoken to you about it beforehand and I actually posted the invisibility cloak on a while ago on The contract where shino's problem was.

[Salah~]

evie said:

Whoah really? O.o WOOH! I hope those work out well for you, Shino and Cat Assasain.

And taylin, how'd I steal your idea? I'd never spoken to you about it beforehand and I actually posted the invisibility cloak on a while ago on The contract where shino's problem was.

I think it was probably just a lighthearted comment.

[Omni]

salamander said:

evie said:

Whoah really? O.o WOOH! I hope those work out well for you, Shino and Cat Assasain.

And taylin, how'd I steal your idea? I'd never spoken to you about it beforehand and I actually posted the invisibility cloak on a while ago on The contract where shino's problem was.

I think it was probably just a lighthearted comment.

I'm not entirely sure what you mean by 'lighthearted'. I wasn't angry, if that's what you mean.

I actually had the idea of the invisibility cloak before this was brought into our Manor here for consideration. You happened to have the same idea and post it. The 'stole' part was kind of a joke, because you didn't actually steal anything, or even intend to. Like I said, I'm not angry. That stuff happens.

[Deleted]

Ikkin: Thanks! ^^ Creativity, woot!