NTWF Mafia II: The Idyllic Village of Wafflenet

[Celestial]

When the food inspector arrived, Diana decided it was best to hold back and observe. Official investigations were often a useful tool for historians and besides, seeing the townspeople all locked up together with her colleagues was amusing to say the least. They squealed and cried and panicked and tried to outsmart Mr. Err Bear, something which pleased Diana greatly. However, she took great pains to make sure that pleasure was not reflected in her notes as she wrote everything down. It would be unprofessional of her to register such a thing and let her good judgement be affected by such things as emotions and bias. One thing that Diana was never going to be, even as she descended into the deepest parts of the underworld, in every sense of the term, is unprofessional. Her research could not be open for criticism. Even if it was funny to watch them squirm. As she hovered on the edge of the action next to the newly-remade gallows that had been used to kill another innocent, she faded out of sight and wrote things down, glad that she still had her stationary with her.

The fun could not last forever as eventually, thanks to the ever-useful Sparky, whose method in this situation Diana greatly approved of. His assistant would no doubt be back with help but by the time she did, this town would hopeflly be safely torn apart, if the historian and her colleagues had their way. For now, the inspector was safely neutralised and Diana, having gotten her information down, appeared once again in the town square, just in time to see Osi tumble down from the roof of the shack where he usually was. Diana caught a glimpse of the faces of her fellow colleagues and smiled widely, knowing they had claimed another life. She both liked and disliked Osi for the exact same reason: he always saw too much. While she could always use him as a source back when she was just a mild-mannered, if rude historian, she suspected that he must have seen at least some of their activities. He was a risk and she was glad that her colleagues had finally caught on.

Then, of course, as usual, like vultures to a corpse or students to free food, the townsfolk began gathering again and lamenting their fates. Diana hovered closer once a crowd had gathered, noting the perverse smile on the face of Mr. Crane, as though he had almost enjoyed his death. Birds fluttered around him, although as soon as they sensed Diana, they flew away in fear.

Blaze was there first, her wolves no doubt bringing her close. Diana appeared, blood-red as usual and grinned at her.

"They say that the mafia makes people sleep with the fishes. In this case, he flew with the birds and he seemed so happy about it as well," she murmured and brought a hand over Osilon's body and concentrated. With that, she closed his eyes. Let it never be said that her colleagues did not give their kills some dignity in death, unlike the townspeople. They had simply left her to rot.

"Tell me, Blaze Wolfstorm, do you really believe yourself to be so innocent? You think you're better than us and yet, this town too has killed people. You've killed not just me and Mick but your own kind, innocent townspeople, like the wife of that silly Don Dan. You're no better than us even if you pretend to be. The mafia were the ones who initiated this conflict but it was you who carried it on, who drove it further in an attempt to weed us out. Even if you do win, you will never wash the blood off your hands. You are all insignificant in the greater ebb and flow of time. This town's massacre will be a footnote in the pages of history because there are so many others like it in this area alone," she said to Blaze and stood up straight. "Pass this message along. And don't worry if you don't, your fellow townspeople will know anyway. I doubt you'll give up but I warned you. It's pointless."

She looked to the side to see Fluffle walking by, on the way to that cosplay girl's house. Diana smirked and became invisible once again, following the pony. She searched in her jacket for something to use as a weapon but of course, she had nothing. Nothing except a single fountain pen which Diana kept on her person to make notes with when she felt fancy. It had a very sharp tip, sharp enough that from the back, it could feel like a knife.

Diana took it out and waited for the pony to stop. As soon as she did, the historian lunged forward and wrapped an arm around her fluffy little throat, jabbing the pen's tip in between her shoulderblades, or at least where Diana thought the pony had shoulderblades. She wasn't sure, there was just so much fur.

"Hello. I understand you've been seeing dear Michael Angelo. You're close to him, aren't you?" she murmured, driving the pen's tip in further. "Mind taking me to him? I forgot to talk to him about something."

[Mostly Harmless (flufflepuff)]

Fluffle slowed her walk down until she was moving at a baby Pegasus's pace. Dove had to be okay, but if she wasn't...Fluffle winced. The poor girl seemed exhausted. While Fluffle didn't know her very well, she knew that either Dove or Diana could help her, too. What better way to get some assistance was there than to offer it first?

Fluffle stopped and looked behind her. She'd just left Alex and Mick behind without waiting for one of the two to come with her. Fluffle was tired of waiting for things to happen, but she regretted leaving them. She waved unhappily, just in case either of them saw her. In life, she always had the cows to talk to, or work to keep her busy, or hunting for fails and laughs. Now, at that moment, Fluffle had no one. Nopony wanted to be alone. Even in her old home she was a bit of an oddball, and upon moving to Wafflenet, she remained that way for some time. It didn't take much for her to make friends, which was a magical accomplishment. But now, Fluffle was alone on the street, and was quite vulnerable at that. At least, her nonexistent heart was. Fluffle thought she could use a hug.

And out from the shadows sprang Diana in all her crimson glory, wrapping her arms around Fluffle in greeting and petting her! Fluffle was moved. She had heard that Diana was from the mafia, but it appeared that she was reformed too. After all, what other ghost came and hugged you and petted you when you felt lonesome?

While hugging Diana back, Fluffle stamped a hoof twice and "Pbbpblbt"ed the question of books on knitting. She didn't seem to get the message but had a question of her own.

"Hello. I understand you've been seeing dear Michael Angelo. You're close to him, aren't you?" she murmured, driving the pen's tip in further. "Mind taking me to him? I forgot to talk to him about something."

Fluffle felt something scratch her back. LOVELY. She moaned without intending to, clamping a hoof over her mouth. She knew what she sounded like out of context. Michael Angelo? Oh, that was Mick's full name. She understood, it wasn't like anyone called her Fluffle Puff unless something serious was going on. Something serious had to be happening between Diana and Mick. He had been looking for Diana as well, but when Fluffle had gone through that ugly green phase, she noticed that he looked a mite confused. Fluffle decided that she had no cause for worry after all.

What did Diana mean by "close to him?" He'd ridden Fluffle before and--oh. Perhaps Diana was jealous. The best course of action, Fluffle reasoned, was to be as gentle as possible. She motioned for Diana to follow her, then zoomed up to the top of Waffles, No Nets.

A spectral ornate fountain pen clattered silently on the muddy road.

Fluffle saw the pen and dived for it, making sure to clean it on her fluff as she floated back to the roof. She handed the pen sheepishly to Diana. She was sorry one of her items (now covered in ghostly blue fluff) got stuck, just like Osilon's blue jay so long ago. Those things tended to happen.

Fluffle scanned the horizon, searching for any sign of Mick. There was none, which wasn't much of a surprise. The ghosts one was looking for don't ever seem to show up when one is actively searching for it. She tilted her head to the side and "pbblbt"ed her deepest regrets.

Now, asking about the evasive art of knitting seemed more than inappropriate. She hadn't helped Diana at all, so logically she couldn't ask. Fluffle opened her mouth, closed it, embraced Diana, and hopped off the roof...

Ending up in the basement of Waffles, No Nets. There was still water here, now rotten and smelly from the mildew that had gathered. Fluffle, almost as though she developed a habit for it, peeked behind the coffee grounds. The blue plushie was still there. No other ghost was here. A sugar shaker was, though, and it didn't look like other sugar shakers. This one jsd a voice, almost as though Fluffle could hear it talking. The poor thing didnt deserve to rot at the bottom of Waffles, No Nets. Fluffle had a perfectly good reason for "borrowing" the sugar dispenser. There was something that simply made her happy. Perhaps it was the convenient way in which it fit into her fluff without her having to solidify it first.

The pony sighed. There was no point in staying here. She jumped and returned to ground level, then trotted on her way to Dove's place...

Julie was close by. She'd always liked her hat. The pony y solidified her hoof and began her classic knock....


*knock knock knock* PBBLBT. *knock knock knock* PBBLBT.*knock knock knock* PBBLBT.

[Gelquie]

After they had all managed to escape from the chains of the inspectors, Julie had retreated back into Waffles, No Nets and was resting her head against a wall. As much as she wanted to sleep for at least a little bit, she knew it wasn't safe to do so, especially now that they were free. And besides, her home was still too damaged to return to it. Besides, she had the misfortune of having the portion of the collapsed ceiling fall right on top of her bed. A part of her wondered where she was going to sleep that night if she was even going to, but that part of her was overshadowed by her thoughts of what was happening in the town.

There was no way the Inspectors were going to help them now. As the hours dragged on, it eventually seemed like they weren't going to, but a part of her was still hoping that they would at least help investigate. Now, however, that hope was gone. Despite her wanting and wishing for outside help to come stop the murders and deaths, she now knew that it wasn't going to happen. Anything that was going to happen was going to happen on its own... Julie let out a shiver at the thought as the waitress came up to her.

"Are you cold, Ms. Merlot?" she asked her.

"No, I was just thinking... Well, actually, maybe I am a little." Julie made a mental note in her mind to go back to her house to see if there was a jacket laying around. "Anyway, do you have... anything?"

The waitress shook her head sadly. Julie let out a sigh. Ever since the flooding happened, all that she's had to eat was one of the sandwiches that had been salvaged from the Shipshape Shop. And that was hours ago. Still, there wasn't much that could be done about it.

"Just water, then," Julie replied.

"Bottled or tap?"

"Tap is fine."

The waitress walked away, leaving Julie alone at the table, her poncho to her side and her mandolin strapped to her torso as she examined the flute she had salvaged from her home. Thanks to the casing, it was still in good condition. She used her shirt to wipe away anything on the lip plate before she proceeded to blow out a few notes through the instrument. Still sounded good too. So she proceeded to play a melody, allowing herself to sink back into the chair she sat in. As much as she wanted to play her mandolin for this song, her wrists still ached from the manacles. It was even a bit much for the flute, so she occasionally put down her flute and resorted to pure singing, just singing what was on her mind.

"Only so few here remain
Enduring trouble through rain
We thought hope came on the train,
But tarnished hope with the chains."

Julie saw the waitress return and set down a cup of water in front of her just as she began singing the next stanza.

"Though our town is still alive,
Some here have morals bereft.
But though alone, we must strive
To save the good we have--"

A bloodcurdling scream hit the air, interrupting Julie's word 'left'. No, please don't tell her there was another one, not another death... But what if it wasn't someone dying? There were only so few good people in the town left. But who was the one who yelled? And why?

Leaving behind the cup of water on the table, she clutched her flute in her hand and dashed out the door, heading in the direction where she thought the scream originated. She wasn't thinking about what she would do if she got there, and she ultimately wasn't sure how much help she would be, especially if it was someone attacking the screamer. But she couldn't hide from the situation. Not anymore.

Too many people were dead already.

[Robyn]

She'd retreated to her desk, sitting up straight as a board in her high-end leather Chocobo computer chair, unable to take her eyes off of the horror prop that Osilon's goggles had become. They rested on the floor, the lenses askew, toppling over its own straps and still reflecting a blackish-red in the lamplight. Dove could hardly bring herself to blink. It was somehow reproachable, like a dead roach on the floor, something that she couldn't bear to have in her sight but was equally loathe to touch.

With a shuddering sigh, Dove turned around. Her letter to Robyn (which, thus far, consisted of Dear Robyn, I) was uninspired at the moment. She was battling too many thoughts to be able to place even one down in ink. Her suspicions, her future, her losses, her past--

-The smell of tall summer grass tickled her nose as it itched past her legs. Cicadas buzzed, and the sun was sinking orange into the earth. Her only guide was a miniature pair of goggles poking up from the wildwheat. "Wait up, Osi-kun! Hey, I said wait!"

Her pen felt like stone in her hand. Two scenes warred for presence in her mind, the memories merging and jarring like stormwinds.

--Chaetura-san's shouts had become drowned out by the storm and Dove's escalating side of the argument. "And isn't it JUST LIKE YOU to be the one to hesitate? Why, just so you can see what HAPPENS? Regardless of what's at stake? Safety? FRIENDS? WELL, IT'S A GOOD THING YOU DON'T HAVE ANY NOW!!" The floodwaters rumbled and churned beneath them.

-He held out an arm, which she gracelessly bumped into when she caught up. Before them laid the largest, most beautiful meadow Dove had ever seen in all of her eight years: dappled amber grasses rose untamed for what must have been more than a mile, stretching out to meet the sky without any trees or buildings to impede it. "Is thi--" Osi-kun held a finger to his lips, which Dove found to be incredibly funny, and she nodded, placing one on hers as well.

-- Osilon flung one arm out over the town while furiously wheeling with the other, which then dissolved into jabbing fingerpoints and a couple of other gestures that made Dove gasp. "DO YOU HUG YOUR MOTHER WITH THOSE ARMS? And YES, I'm VERY aware that keeping eye on the town has become a priority as of late, but who died and voted YOU BATMAN?"

-She could hear them rustling in the field. They'd pored over the books together in their school's library-- the great starling migration; thousands upon thousands of blackbirds would soon be taking to the air in a glorious spectacle of nature, twisting and twirling into abstract sky patterns, many becoming one. It was taking too long. She grinned at Osi-kun, taking a sprinter's stance, and didn't notice him frantically shaking his head as she raced laughing into the grass.

-- "Maybe the town doesn't need you! Ever thought about that?" Osilon slashed an arm across his body and redirected it to her. Dove snarled. "Oh, is that what you think? That I'M the one who hasn't been doing anything for these people? I'M trying to inspire HOPE and LOVE and GENUINE CITIZENSHIP. You wouldn't... you would never-- you didn't--"

- "HELP!" She was confused, scared, in pain. The squawks and shrills of thousands of starlings deafened her, their wings and claws blinding and scratching her as they shot up to the sky. Dove was caught in the swarm. She knew her friend couldn't be far-- could he not hear her? "OSI-KUN, HELP ME!" Another stinging blow to the cheek, and she was in tears. Every time she tried to move, she was bumped back into the vortex by a dozen flying monsters. Where was he?

-- The rain was pouring as silence overtook the conversation. No gestures, no motions, just silence between the two. They were both remembering.

- After an eternity of tar-feathered hell, the last of the birds finally departed, leaving Dove trembling in the middle of the field, small dots of blood beginning to bead in various places. Osi-kun was standing at the edge of the field, one foot forward, a pale look of hesitance on his face. He slowly retracted his goggles to normal magnification. Dove was furious. Hiccuping, she yelled, "You could hear me out there, couldn't you? I know you could! Why didn't you come help me?" No answer. "That was so scary just now, and- and you didn't do anything! Were you just... were you just watching?" But she already knew. He was reaching out for a bruised arm when she jerked away and started running back home. She could feel his eyes following her. Face burning with humiliation and anger, she yelled, "Don't follow me, Osilon! I hate you!"

-- Osilon furrowed his brow, fixing her with a sharp look, and she rolled her eyes. "Yeah, so what, I disturbed their biological clocks? I was EIGHT. You shouldn't have even known that term at your age." Osilon sighed. He weakly tossed up his hands, defeated. Dove was shaking by now. "Well...well, so what, if it's old news. It was enough to tell me what kind of person you are. You never did apologize, and. I guess I never forgave you. I guess we never forgave each other." They stared at each other, each feeling something they couldn't quite place.

They hadn't patched anything up that night, and Dove supposed she hadn't planned on doing so in the future. It was too deep of a trauma for her to bridge, as miniscule as it might have seemed to an outside party, and besides, she'd gotten quite used to both filling and dealing with the whole non-life-threatening antagonist role in her life.

She'd never suspected Osi. She'd known him too well for that.

The letter remained blank, save for a few smudged stains dotting the page.

[Draco]

Rocky had reluctantly let Mick go. He would continue to bother him in a little while. Besides, he was getting tired of hearing that angry voice in his head... If he got the chance, he'll offer that voice a job maybe. Might be able to handle finances.

He floated around, barely missing the "assault" on Fluffle from Diana, going past after she had taken off. He notices the red ghost and chuckles to himself. What was it she said about ghosts in the past? He'll need to ask her later.

He now came across the unconscious ghost of Osi on the ground. He looks around to see if anyone was around, when he saw he was pretty much alone, he poked him a few times with a rose. When he got no response he left a colored rose next to Osi along with a business card. On it was written a message, "Come see me when you wake up. -Rocky Boulder Rockfell" Along with it was a small doodle of himself. He left Osi to sleep.

Floating around he pondered who else to invite to the G-Host club. He had a cook ready to work, he had the mysterious silent host ready, and he of course had himself! But the G-Host Club was seriously lacking in variety... No twins, no cute child like men, bad boys, or anything really interesting! Maybe he could ask Mony? Would that be odd? He wasn't sure... THE PYTHON?

"Only when I'm desperate."

He was going to ask Fluffle to assist Mick, but she took off before he could ask. He needed a expert on the matter, but he wasn't about to go ask his sister for another favor. Maybe that Dove girl could help. He took off in the direction of Dove's place.

---

Mr. Fluffypants was starting to get annoyed. He didn't seem to have any time to talk to the people of the town. Every time he saw a chance they were busy. Then when they weren't busy he was helping the cats! Currently he was sitting outside Penny's house. He wasn't sure why, but the cats wanted to explore her house for some reason... He took out a notepad and started to scribble down notes on the people and ghosts. Pretty much everything he could gather on them from seeing them the little he has so far. If he was going to set up tours here, he needed to know what he was talking about. He thought about bringing a ghost from his town here to help, but that one mafia member laughed at him and kicked him in the head! Of course, it went through him... The ghost laughed at him, then another one slapped him. The slap didn't go through. Darn dead mafia...

---

Rocky had never heard the scream. There was no excuse why he didn't hear it, but for some reason he just didn't. He floated through the wall oblivious of any noises that might have been made. He simply floated into her room.

"So I wa-"

He stares at Dove, then around the room. He eyes the goggles. Walking (floating) over to Dove from behind, reaching around her he holds a rose to her.

"Dearest Dove, do not weep. It doesn't suit you. For you are far more glorious when you are smiling! You inspire hope to the people, you inspire love between the people, you are a important part of this town! Now is not the time to lose you. You will have time to weep when the villains of this town are put to justice!"

He lays the rose on desk and makes a few poses behind Dove.

"Even in death I am working to bring light to this town. I've all ready enlisted people to the group."

A little under his breath, "Even if they haven't really agreed yet. I mean that bird guy was sort of sleeping."

"By the way, do you know anything about hosts?"

[Jayeee]

Wafflnet had been awfully dull for PYTHON MARLEY as of late. After his little conversation with Don Dan, he'd become increasingly bored of the town, and besides, the chains he'd wrapped himself in were heavy.

As such, PYTHON MARLEY had retreated to Bro Heaven for a while. He liked it there. None of those lesser beings getting in the way, - just men kicking back and drinking beer - females were only permitted if the men decided to summon them up from woman hell. It was a nice life.

But something kept PYTHON MARLEY from staying there forever. He still had unfinished business. That stupid little town of Wafflenet had to be changed, one way or the other. PYTHON MARLEY knew that it was his duty to punch the place into shape. He wouldn't rest until women were slaves once more. Well, maybe he would rest a little, Bro Heaven was just too tempting to pass up every now and again.

Of course, a new entrance into Wafflenet meant a new uniform, and PYTHON MARLEY had the perfect idea. It didn't even require much change. He always astounded himself at how resourceful and brilliant he was. Even dead, he was an asset to the world - his modelling career would hit a whole new level now.

Appearing back in the quiet town, PYTHON THE FRIENDLY GHOST floated through the streets. His ghostly form was shirtless, but instead of legs, his bottom half trailed off in a ghostly wisp. Obviously when he died, a mob of his fans had destroyed the whole place in outrage. He was touched, even more so when he saw the Mahb family home completely annihilated. He couldn't wait to see the look on Ginz's face when he gloated about that. He hoped that any pictures or records of Malvin Mahb had been destroyed forever, and he could happily exist as PYTHON THE FRIENDLY GHOST for all time.

Noticing a crowd gathered in an alleyway, PYTHON THE FRIENDLY GHOST hovered towards it. Maybe this was the mob of his fans. He had to go and say hello.

"Yo, bros and unfortunate not-bros," he announced floating through the crowd, entirely oblivious of the dead Osi Crane lying on the ground. "PYTHON THE FRIENDLY GHOST is totally happy to see this town destroyed all in PYTHON THE FRIENDLY GHOST's name." he flexed a ghostly arm. "You're one step closer fixing yourselves. Everybody, give your women a punch to the face, PYTHON THE FRIENDLY GHOST is proud of you."

He grinned. "Pretty awesome uniform now, right? Way back when, LITTLE PYTHON watched this killer movie called Casper the friendly ghost. That little dude used to terrorize women. Didn't kill any though, so it's a solid six out of ten."

PYTHON THE FRIENDLY GHOST caught sight of Osi lying on the floor. "Bro..." he trailed off, shaking his head. "PYTHON THE FRIENDLY GHOST hangs his head in disappointment. He had such high plans for you, dawg. PYTHON THE FRIEND GHOST's noggin could've survived that, but there's no way his apprentice could have those skills yet."

He floated up to Tracy Chaetura. "Yo, chick. You kill this kid as part of the PYTHON MOB? Because PYTHON THE FRIENDLY GHOST is going to snap the necks of whoever did this to his future-bro. Not cool, chick." he frowned and punched the air with aggression. "NOT. COOL!"

[icon]

He landed.

That was new, that was likely a good thing. If you could control yourself enough to not phase through the earth on accident, then you were alive enough. He tried putting his hand through a nearby wall; it did, unfortunately, phase through. Drat. Ghost it was. Well, at least it was worth a shot.

Osi pushed off the ground, now floating, hovering a few inches in the air. Alright, mental checklist time:

1) He was now dead, which was a minor inconvenience.

2) He was back in Wafflenet as a ghost (slightly less of an inconvenience).

3) The Mafia were still at large; very much a problem.

4) Unlike some of the other ghosts around town, his memory was fresh enough to remember a bit about the Mafia. A voice, maybe, or just a sense of chaos. The memory wouldn't last long, but it was there.

He stopped and thought for a moment. Best course of action right now? Directly confronting the Mafia members wouldn't work, he had seen a particularly nasty-looking revenant around earlier who he was assuming to be the late Diana Pallada. There was too much to be done, too many actions, too many thoughts...

He decided to start with the most pressing matter and check on himself. His body. His corporeal body, not the one he was in right now. Avoiding the other ghosts and townspeople as much as possible, he made his way to the Shipshape Shop...

Oh. That was certainly dead-looking, alright. Though he couldn't help but notice a certain lack of goggles. He frowned; those were nice goggles. True, ghost-Osi had a pair of ethereal lenses on right now, but it would be nice to get the other ones back. He looked around; was that some sort of... ghost business card? He'd examine it later, the goggles were more pressing.

Oh, double drat, he thought. A few small dove feathers on the ground, right by his head. Well, his corporeal head, the him that wasn't the him who he was at this minute. The frown increased; thinking in terms of self when there were two of you was hard. But back to the goggles, he thought; Dove must've had them. That would be lovely, dealing with her right after death. Why would she even want his goggles, anyways? He grumbled a moment, then floated past the Shop into one of Wafflenet's backstreets. If he was going to get to her house, at least he was going to do it without having to encounter any other not-quite-dead folks.

[Robyn]

Dove none too gently wiped the angry tears away from her face. Why was she crying? This was stupid. All of this, every bit. She crumpled the letter to her cousin and pitched it at the wall, where it dropped and landed neatly in the wastebasket. What help would Robyn be? She was already dead. Besides, anything other than good news would just be a bother...

"Dearest Dove, do not weep. It doesn't suit you. For you are far more glorious when you are smiling! You inspire hope to the people, you inspire love between the people, you are a important part of this town! Now is not the time to lose you. You will have time to weep when the villains of this town are put to justice!"

"Huh? Who's there?" Dove mumbled, turning around.

To her surprise, there floated the ghost of Alex-- err, wait, it was Rocky now, wasn't it? She'd seen him floating around and causing a few spectacles since his death, though she'd usually been too busy with her own activities to say much to him. That, and. Well. The honest truth was that she found him just the slightest bit intimidating! His gorgeous ice-blonde hair, his supernatural eyes, his tasteful suit-- it was the exact kind of bishie-bishie doki-doki uguu ensemble that Dove was absolutely crazy about. She put a hand to her heart, touched by his kind words and secretly flattered by this ghostly attention. Is that weird of me?, Dove thought before realizing that she wasn't exactly one to talk about what constituted weird.

She hadn't remembered him being nearly this nice in life, but he certainly had a new M.O. in death, it appeared. He proceeded to lay it all out for her. Her previous bad mood was beginning to lift away in his presence. Crazy what talking to a fellow weeaboo can accomplish!

"Even in death I am working to bring light to this town. I've all ready enlisted people to the group. (Even if they haven't really agreed yet. I mean that bird guy was sort of sleeping.) By the way, do you know anything about hosts?"

"Oh, Rocky-sama!" Dove giggled, swatting a hand playfully, "Don't INSULT me. Of course I know about hosts. I'm probably the only one in all of Wafflenet who does. In fact, I've been lobbying for a number of maid cafes and host clubs to open up in town for years. It's just a shame there won't be a large customer base now that...well, that we're running low on customers in general."

Still a bit glum at that downer of a fact, Dove picked up the rose. A few ghostly sparkles floated off of the petals like stardust, and its perfumed aroma drifted up to ensnare her senses, divine. This Rocky guy really knew his stuff, host-wise. With whatever smile she could manage, she shook the flower in his direction.

"Well, if you ever need a manager that's on your level with this whole business, come talk to me. I know all the genres, all the tropes, and all the plays on poor anime-watching girls' hearts, being a rather versed one myself. We might have to talk about WHO exactly your options for hosts are, what with the limited resources in this town, but, all in all, I'd be happy to pitch in! So sugoi!"

The idea was starting to perk her up. Where'd that Mick fellow run off to? He'd always seemed like quite the cutie-pie. He'd probably work well as their "natural"... Or, wait, hadn't he been mafia? Dove glanced to the side. A slight problem, but nothing that death hadn't already worked out, right?

Dove shrugged, sliding out of her chair to pace. She always thought things out better when she was on the move. But as soon as she took the first step, her footsteps stuttered, halted. The goggles were still on the floor, and there was no way she was going near those things again.

She supposed she could always ask Rocky to move them, but she wasn't sure of what he was capable of doing in his form. One ghost was enough; she didn't know if she could stand to have Osilon haunting her in her own home just because of these dumb face-glasses.

[Lizica]

"Yo, chick. You kill this kid as part of the PYTHON MOB? Because PYTHON THE FRIENDLY GHOST is going to snap the necks of whoever did this to his future-bro. Not cool, chick." He frowned and punched the air with aggression. "NOT. COOL!"

Tracy blinked at and studied THE PYTHON's ghost rather blankly, not entirely listening, before a slow, unsure dawn broke over her face.

"You're...unaffected by the aliens..." she murmured, almost to herself. "You can float..." She looked up. "You could go up and infiltrate the mothership ITSELF."

She took an unsteady step back away from her fallen tenant and took a cleansing breath. This was not over. She could not stop, not yet. Maybe every other scheme she had concocted heretofore had failed, but this was not over yet. She slipped back into the Shipshape Shop and pulled out a muddy shovel from behind her tools. Hefting it, she burst back outside.

"I'm going to dig pitfalls to trap the government! Anyone can help!" she said to the crowd. Blaze was there--good, maybe her wolves could help dig? Then, pointing the shovel at THE PYTHON: "Thank you, sir!"

And she hurried away to the diner, made her way through the crowd (was that Aaron Bear there chained up?), and found the nets in the attic. Dragging the large net and shovel back out through a diner proved to be no small task, however, and she accidentally knocked over countless glasses of water, tangled up half a dozen townspeople, and tipped over Courtknee's cereal on her way out. "Sorry--I need this--sorry--I'm building pitfalls--sorry, Mrs. Johnson--yes, to stop the food inspector's cronies--sorry--anyone is free to help me, I--hang on--sorry, can you grab that end for me real quick?--"

By the time she had made it back to the front of the diner, everyone was so exasperated with Tracy and her net (and her radio blaring static) that they essentially just kicked her out. "They're coming for revenge!" she called into the diner as Tanya slammed the door in her face. "Also to prevent us all from blabbing about the aliens!"

She paused in the silence. Tried not to look back at the gallows. Tried not to look back at the crowd around the shop's alley. Straightened her ballcap. Hit her radio once. Hard rock music.

Hardball, she thought, and dragged the net and shovel to the outskirts of town, a short distance down the road from the train station. She started digging.

[Gelquie]

Julie rushed as quick as she could through town, managing not to travel through the same area where a small crowd had gathered. Eventually, she entered a residential area to find herself facing Dove's house. With what she knew of Dove and how far away the house was, she concluded that it may have come from this area. Or if it didn't, maybe Dove could help her figure out where to go next.

Julie stopped to catch her breath as she stared at the house. It seemed awfully quiet now. Was it too late? Was there even a killer inside? And if so, could she even defend herself? Julie berated herself for not calling for someone to help out earlier. She stared at the house with bated breath. If nothing else, if the killer was still in there (if there was one in there), maybe she could find out who they are, and then maybe she could help out in stopping this once and for all. But if she got caught...

As she walked closer, she began to hear commotion inside; people talking. That sounded like Dove's voice... And it didn't sound like she was in danger... And then there was Alex's voice. But ghosts weren't unusual around here, or at least not anymore. So if it did come from her, why was there screaming?

Julie walked up to the door and hesitated before knocking on it three times. "Dove! It's Julie! Is everything all right in there?"

[Avery]

Brit like, sort of kinda wanted to stay in the diner just like, forever, because she so totes had no interest in being a part of the inevitably angry-and-execution-happy crowd that was still gathered around the dead body. But like, then Snuggles did his "I HAVE TO WEE" whine. And even though Waffles, No Nets was a super totes wreck, with mushy floors and all RUINED LIKE in general, Brit knew that if she let Snuggles pee on the floor here, and Tanya saw-- well, that would be the end of Brit being allowed inside the diner. And if she wasn't allowed inside the diner then, like, she would literally have nowhere to go in this dumb town!

So, with a sigh, Brit took Snuggles outside, scooping him out of her handbag and placing him on the cobblestones. Brit like, totes didn't believe in leashes for cute wittle fluffy dogs, so she simply trailed after Snuggles as he sniffed about. After he went, Brit like, totes wanted to just go back into the diner, but as she tucked Snuggles back into the handbag and started towards Waffles, No Nets, she like, realised something: if she walked by the large crowd around Osi's body without saying anything, or even acknowledging it, the town might like, find that super suspicious. AND EXECUTE HER! Which Brit totes didn't want.

Which was how Brit like, found herself at the fringe of the crowd, her stomach flopping the whole time. Like, just say a few words, then get back in the diner. That was her objective.

"Like, so sad about this death!" she chirped to the nearest person who happened to be... Yelly. Urgh. Oh well. As long as she like, talked to someone about being super sad about Osi dying. "I just, he was sooo kewl and it's sooo sad he is like, not alive!"

[♥ Azzie]

It was an interesting experience, being dead.

Nora had never expected to be caught. She'd been very careful, leaving behind as few signs as humanly possible, disguising all the areas that the police looked for to find the culprit.
She supposed that was why she'd been caught by her fellow criminals.

It was strange- life had started to make more sense the longer she'd been dead. At first, she'd been confused- how had she failed? She felt decidedly powerless, which was the exact opposite of how she'd felt only hours before. She'd been on top of the world, she'd been flying before the mafia found her. And now she was... Still. And underneath had been this nagging feeling- she'd lost.

But now... Now it didn't seem to matter. She hadn't been all that powerful, really, in the long run; death didn't seem to be much of an obstacle in this town. Even that didn't surprise her; she could see the ghosts now, and she could feel all manner of strange things, but it didn't bother her. It was just another change, and she supposed she would have to live with it.

She flew toward her home and felt, for the first time in years, real pain. Someone had let the chickens out. The gate was open, and she could see it had been empty for several days. She wanted to cry- only she found that she couldn't. She only hoped someone would feed them.

And then a thought occurred to her. The chickens- her beloved pets who she loved like children- they were gone. Harold had been gone for years now. And now, Nora's own body was gone.
What was keeping her here?

She'd lived there all her life. But that was over, now, wasn't it? Didn't she deserve to start fresh? She suddenly felt powerful again, filled with a power far better than the ability to take a life: freedom.
It felt good. She didn't care anymore that Harold had been the focus of their family in life; it just stopped mattering. It was like feeling a weight lift off her shoulders- except she could barely remember what that weight had felt like in the first place.

Nora smiled- she thought it was appropriate to begin with a smile- and drifted into the air, toward the mountains that looked so far away, and away from everything she had ever had, had ever been, had ever wanted.

She was free.

[Terra]

Blaze looked up. Diana had appeared, once again, floating above Osilon’s body.

"They say that the mafia makes people sleep with the fishes. In this case, he flew with the birds and he seemed so happy about it as well," she murmured and brought a hand over Osilon's body and concentrated. With that, she closed his eyes.

“DON’T TOUCH HIM,” she yelped, but it was too late.

Blaze glared at Diana. How dare she talk about the bird dude like that? Especially when her murder-buddies were almost certainly responsible for his death?

Then Diana started villain-monologuing again. Blaze sighed.

"Tell me, Blaze Wolfstorm, do you really believe yourself to be so innocent? You think you're better than us and yet, this town too has killed people. You've killed not just me and Mick but your own kind, innocent townspeople, like the wife of that silly Don Dan. You're no better than us even if you pretend to be. The mafia were the ones who initiated this conflict but it was you who carried it on, who drove it further in an attempt to weed us out. Even if you do win, you will never wash the blood off your hands. You are all insignificant in the greater ebb and flow of time. This town's massacre will be a footnote in the pages of history because there are so many others like it in this area alone," she said to Blaze and stood up straight. "Pass this message along. And don't worry if you don't, your fellow townspeople will know anyway. I doubt you'll give up but I warned you. It's pointless."

“WOW,” said Blaze. “WHERE DO I EVEN START. LIKE. I DON’T SEE HOW YOU CAN ACT ALL SUPERIOR TO US WHEN YOU’RE THE ONE WHO STARTED THE KILLING IN THE FIRST PLACE. AND WHAT WAS EVEN THE PURPOSE BEHIND THESE KILLINGS? AT LEAST THE TOWNSPEOPLE OUTSIDE YOUR STUPID GROUP ACTUALLY HAD A REASON TO HANG ALL THOSE PEOPLE, EVEN IF THEY WERE HOPELESSLY MISGUIDED AT TIMES, which is SOMETHING I FULLY ADMIT WAS THE CASE, YES. BUT WHY DID YOU DECIDE TO KILL ALL THESE PEOPLE? IF THIS IS ALL INSIGNIFICANT, THEN WHAT KIND OF LOGICAL REASON COULD YOU HAVE, ANYWAY?

“I’D REALLY LIKE TO HEAR WHAT YOU HAVE TO SAY,” said Blaze. “IF YOU CAN COME UP WITH ANY KIND OF RATIONAL JUSTIFICATION FOR ALL YOUR MURDERS, I’D BE REALLY IMPRESSED.

“ALSO,” she added, “WHY ARE YOU BOTHERING ME SO MUCH, ANYWAY? I DON’T REALLY UNDERSTAND WHY YOU SEEM TO BE TAUNTING ME SO MUCH. ALMOST EXCLUSIVELY, REALLY. WHAT IS UP WITH THAT? ARE YOU, LIKE, OBSESSED WITH ME OR SOMETHING? I DON’T GET IT.”

"Yo, chick. You kill this kid as part of the PYTHON MOB? Because PYTHON THE FRIENDLY GHOST is going to snap the necks of whoever did this to his future-bro. Not cool, chick." He frowned and punched the air with aggression. "NOT. COOL!"

Blaze turned around. It was THE PYTHON again, threatening Tracy. Blaze was about to yell at him to leave her alone when Tracy spoke -

"You're...unaffected by the aliens..." she murmured, almost to herself. "You can float..." She looked up. "You could go up and infiltrate the mothership ITSELF.”

Blaze blinked. Whatever floats your boat, I guess, she thought as Tracy zipped into her shop and returned with a shovel.

"I'm going to dig pitfalls to trap the government! Anyone can help!" she said to the crowd. Then, pointing the shovel at THE PYTHON: "Thank you, sir!"

“Wait, but WEREN’T WE GOING TO FIND THE TOWNSPEOPLE HELPING THE ALIENS IN THE VILLAGE OR SOMETHING?”

But Tracy didn’t respond as she rushed away. Great.

As Blaze considered what she could do - Tracy seemed to no longer be available to help conquer the Mafia or find Chrysanthemum - that teenage city girl began talking to her.

"Like, so sad about this death!" she chirped. "I just, he was sooo kewl and it's sooo sad he is like, not alive!"

“I KNOW,” said Blaze. “He was a PRETTY GREAT PERSON. I’M GONNA MISS HIM.”

She looked at Britknee. “Say, you wouldn’t happen to have SEEN CHRYSANTHEMUM or anything lately, HAVE YOU? He’s the WOLF WHO ISN’T PRIMROSE WHO I’VE RECENTLY BROUGHT INTO TOWN. Also, DO YOU HAPPEN TO KNOW WHERE DOVE MIGHT BE? Since TRACY’S GONE WHO-KNOWS-WHERE, WE SHOULD PROBABLY GET TOGETHER TO PLAN WHAT WE SHOULD DO ABOUT THE MAFIA SITUATION.” A thought struck her. “OH, AND ALSO THAT ERR BEAR DUDE. WE SHOULD PROBABLY FIGURE OUT WHAT TO DO ABOUT THAT.”

[Avery]

With Err Bear tied up and unconscious in the diner, and the body of Osi Crane splayed out in the town centre, broken-necked and smiling, emotions were running fairly high in the wee village of Wafflenet.

It was nighttime now, the sky black as ink and starless, and the air was very still, without even the slightest of breezes. It seemed odd to think that just twenty-four hours before, the horrific storm had been reaching its plateau-- and even odder when the townspeople realised that most of them had hardly slept since then. They were beyond exhausted, jittery, and paranoid; their wrists still bore blisters from being chained by Err; and more than anything in the world, they wanted someone to pay. A scapegoat for their troubles, for the horrendous way things had been going as of late: the murders, the destroying storm and its accompanying flood, the rogue inspector and his since-fled assistant.

"There can't be many murderers left!" they cried. "We must be getting close to ending them! We cannot give up now!"

And so once again they began to play the game of "lob the accusation"-- and it became very clear, very quickly, that one man was bearing the brunt of the blame.

"You should not still be alive!" they shrieked at him. "It is very suspicious that you still are. Your sister-in-law, after all, is dead. As is your brother-in-law, and your wife. So how is it that are you still living, Don Dan? And that name! Maphia! Why, it's like you're teasing us!"

"I am not teasing you," Don Dan said weakly. He'd been expecting this for so very long now, but still, that didn't mean he was going to let the town string him up like a Christmas light without any refutation. "My family is dead, that is true. But it is not of my own hand. I am not in the mafia."

"Lies!" screamed the town. "Lies, lies, lie!"

And then they descended upon him, and hoisted him up the gallows as a faint, waxy sliver of moon shone down on them. Don Dan did not have the energy to fight, though he continued murmuring pleas of his innocence as they tied the rope around his neck. And right before the trapdoor dropped, and Don Dan was left to hang, he shot one person in the crowd a despondent look, one that said: I don't blame you for not trying to save me; I know you can't risk it. You will be the only one left now. And in my name, and Diana's name, and Mick's name-- you must continue on!

The trapdoor opened beneath him.

The last remaining mafia member turned their head, unable to watch as Don Dan fell.

**

So caught up in the fervor of execution, it took the citizens of Wafflenet longer than it should have to notice the mass of people on the road up ahead, walking towards the town centre. In fact, it was not until the cluster was only a couple hundred yards away from the gallows-- and Don Dan's body-- that anyone saw them at all.

And that was when all pandemonium broke loose.

"It's that Monica girl!" shrieked Sparky Drama O'Llama. "And-- and-- oh my! She's brought reinforcements! Dozens of them!"

"They'll arrest us!" cried Chet Flash. "We have to run!"

"No!" yelled back Goldie Fisher, the owner of Wafflenet's fishing supply store, Nets, No Waffles, which sat three doors down from the diner. "If we run, they'll just track us down! We must barricade. Quick someone, go grab Err Bear. Drag him into my store. Then we'll lock him, and ourselves, inside. Threaten to kill him if they dare break down the door." When no one immediately acted, she added, "Now! Before the reach us!"

The town then devolved into a flurry of activity as a few of the townspeople ran to the diner to collect the still-unconscious Err Bear, and the rest fled into Nets, No Waffles. Monica and the approaching lawmen saw the sudden rush and picked up their pace-- but had only just broken into the town centre as the last townsperson, with Err hooked under his arms, ran into Nets, No Waffles and slammed shut the door behind him. Dropping Err on the ground like a sack of potatoes, the townsperson quickly secured the deadbolt.

It only took moments for the thunks to start, as the lawmen reached the door and attempted to kick it down. "Come out!" they yelled. "Release Inspector Bear and surrender, all of you!"

"No!" yelled Goldie Fisher, as several of the stronger citizens wrestled a heavy iron shelf in front of the door to steel it against the lawmens' kicks. "Back off! If you try and come in here, we'll kill the Inspector!"

"We're not leaving!" yelled the lawmen.

"Well, neither are we!" said Goldie.

The standoff began.

Don Dan Maphia was a MAFIA MEMBER.

Current Status: Inside Nets, No Waffles, in a very tense stand-off with Monica and the lawmen.

SPOILER: Click to show

Put simply, Don Dan's life was all a ruse. Everything, down to the marriage to his unsuspecting wife. How best to throw off the scent than by foregrounding exactly that which he was hiding?

Don Dan reveled in rubbing his secret in people's faces without their knowing. His running from small town to small town "to escape people's judgmental glares?" Nope, he was just running after inflicting the damage necessary to destroy each and every one of those towns. His real name? Danny Maphiarello, a gangly wannabe mobster who grew up watching his idols kill, maim, threaten, and eat a bunch of spaghetti. But after getting just a little TOO ambitious, he was thrown out of the town he called his home, leading him to wander the country searching for mafias to take this sad homeless mobster in. No one took him seriously in his hometown, and flicked him off their shoulder like a pesky fly. Out to prove them wrong, he attempted to join in on mafias from the east coast to the west. Wafflenet's just the latest victim.

[icon]

Osi stirred.

He was in Dove's house now; normally he would have qualms about this, but hey, he was a ghost now. He floated through the floor, searching for his goggles... there they were! And they were only slightly wrecked.

With enough concentration, Osilon found he could pick up his goggles. Perfect. Concentrate, concentrate, head for the window...

A fluttering noise. He stopped. The fluttering grew... and Dove's doves burst in.

For a few moments, everything was feathers and cooing and discord. Osi was glad that the pigeons simply phased through him, though he did duck a bit when any swooped too close; habits were hard to drop, even in death.

Osi finally managed to get the goggles out an open window, although a few pigeons flew out as well in the process. Alright, he thought as he made his way towards the square. Now he could drop these off on his corpse and get back to helping the town. He reached the town square...

Well, looked like the citizens had lynched Don Dan. That was good, at least. Better than the other way around. He found his body still in front of the Shipshape Shop and stuck the goggles over his eyes, mildly surprised that nobody had bothered to move it, but only for a few moments- then he looked around and actually saw why. The townspeople were preoccupied with something a bit more important than disposing of corpses; in particular, the mob of angry officials who were now trying to move into the town square. They were constructing a blockade of sorts inside of... Nets, No Waffles, the fishing supplies store.

Osi frowned. He'd never really taken much interest in the store, not after he found out that fly fishing didn't involve actual flight; but it seemed like a reasonable place, and if the town was cooped up inside then he might as well try to give them a hand, anything to do to help.

Glance about the square; check the time. It was late now, the birds were almost all getting ready to nest.

He grinned. But not all of them were, were they...

Two minutes later, the authorities outside Nets, No Waffles were besieged by owls.