Post by Avery on Jan 24, 2015 21:31:37 GMT -5
Page 7D
Faulty Toaster Blamed for Stalbucks Blaze
ADMIN ALLEY-- Investigators today finally released the cause of the inferno that tore through Stalbucks several weeks ago, burning it to the ground. The final investigative report shows that a faulty toaster was to blame-- putting to rest rumours that it was an arson.
The toaster, found still miraculously in tact amongst the wreckage, was destroyed by the Mods this morning to ensure it could inflict no further damage. The owner of the ruined franchise, Mr. Stal, expressed great relief that the destruction of his business was not malicious, and expressed an earnest wish to rebuild. He also thanked the community for their support, and joked that "I guess once I [reopen], I'll only rely on microwaves!"
The toaster, found still miraculously in tact amongst the wreckage, was destroyed by the Mods this morning to ensure it could inflict no further damage. The owner of the ruined franchise, Mr. Stal, expressed great relief that the destruction of his business was not malicious, and expressed an earnest wish to rebuild. He also thanked the community for their support, and joked that "I guess once I [reopen], I'll only rely on microwaves!"
--Jonah Liszt,
staff reporter
staff reporter
Page 8A
Body Disappears From Morgue
ADMIN ALLEY-- The Medical Examiner's office is requesting the public's help today in locating the person who seemingly snatched a corpse from the building, located as 900 Moderator Lane, Admin Alley, late last night. The corpse of murder victim S. Cara Ack reportedly vanished sometime between the close of business Friday and the open of business on Saturday morning.
The head coroner, Cora P. Se, stressed that at this time, the Mods are investigating the incident as a mere "mean-spirited prank", but cautions that such thievery is a crime and will be punished to the fullest extent of the law. "Please, think of Ms. Ack's family," said Ms. Se. "They are already mourning, and it's cruel to deny them the right to at least bury their loved one."
Ms. Se advised anybody with a lead to lodge a tip at 555-1233; she noted that callers can remain anonymous.
The Mods could not be reached for comment.
The head coroner, Cora P. Se, stressed that at this time, the Mods are investigating the incident as a mere "mean-spirited prank", but cautions that such thievery is a crime and will be punished to the fullest extent of the law. "Please, think of Ms. Ack's family," said Ms. Se. "They are already mourning, and it's cruel to deny them the right to at least bury their loved one."
Ms. Se advised anybody with a lead to lodge a tip at 555-1233; she noted that callers can remain anonymous.
The Mods could not be reached for comment.
--Rhea Porter,
staff reporter
staff reporter
9-1-1 Call Log Transcript; unknown mobile number, Jan. 25th, 00:12 NST:
Operator: 9-1-1, what is your emergency?
Caller: I'm sorry. I just... something's wrong with me, I'm sorry-- I can't-- NO-- I can't believe I did, I can't-- [inaudible]
Operator: I'm sorry, I'm having trouble understanding you--
Caller: He's dead. Oh Woo, no, I killed him and he's dead, I can't forgive myself, I'll never forgive myself, I'll never...
Caller: I'm sorry. I just... something's wrong with me, I'm sorry-- I can't-- NO-- I can't believe I did, I can't-- [inaudible]
Operator: I'm sorry, I'm having trouble understanding you--
Caller: He's dead. Oh Woo, no, I killed him and he's dead, I can't forgive myself, I'll never forgive myself, I'll never...
[caller hangs up]
Inter-office email, encrypted network:
From: Tiger <o.tiger@mods.ntwf>
To: Carrie Avery Alaric <c.a.alarci@mods.ntwf>
Subject: URGENT
Av,
Why do you not answer your phone? Why, why, WHY.
This is bad. She is DEAD. Cassie first, now her. This time, not even a mob scene, but the mafia. (I know I sound crazy, a mafia- I sound like Rhya Terr, but Woo, it's true, I have to say it, it's true, we have a MAFIA, oh Woo).
CALL ME. ASAP! We cannot let this get out, that we're not protecting our undercover operatives, we just... we can't afford that publicity right now, oh Woo... this cannot be happening...
To: Carrie Avery Alaric <c.a.alarci@mods.ntwf>
Subject: URGENT
Jan. 25th, 01:01 NST
________________________________________________________________
Av,
Why do you not answer your phone? Why, why, WHY.
This is bad. She is DEAD. Cassie first, now her. This time, not even a mob scene, but the mafia. (I know I sound crazy, a mafia- I sound like Rhya Terr, but Woo, it's true, I have to say it, it's true, we have a MAFIA, oh Woo).
CALL ME. ASAP! We cannot let this get out, that we're not protecting our undercover operatives, we just... we can't afford that publicity right now, oh Woo... this cannot be happening...