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Post by mushroom on Feb 10, 2003 17:10:10 GMT -5
Okay, here's the first part of my editing and stuff: Doom92 was in his beutiful Neohome . As he lain on his bed Shouldn't it be "As he laid..."? I'm not sure, but it sounds more correct to me. This is really an optional, minor thing, but maybe giving a reason why Mysterious Giant Figure starts flying now, rather than having done so the whole time. Maybe Mysterious Giant Figure could reach a clearing or something from which he can easily get up to the sky, rather than having to knock himself out on tree braches above him. I dunno; it might make a bit more sense that way. Overall, though, this is really neat (especially once the errors others have pointed out are corrected). I'd like to read more.
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Post by sollunaestrella on Feb 10, 2003 17:44:51 GMT -5
You know, Jateshi, I used to thinkie you were a boy. I used to thinkie Megz was a boy. I used to think SOL_LUNA_ESTRELLA was a boy. Wow. And meowth4, and . . . I feel . . . high on sugar. XD You seriously thought I was a boy...? I thought jateshi was for a while too as well as Megz. When I first came here, I thought Megz was because she's calvinseviltwin and all.... But sol_luna_estrella is even kind of a girlish name.... Oh, well.
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