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Post by Nut on Feb 8, 2013 19:22:55 GMT -5
Phasing out "masculin" and "feminine" words would be impossible for the French language. XD It's always possible they'd come to be considered "la" or "le" words instead of "feminine" or "masculine". Dutch technically has two categories for words, one gendered (either masculine or feminine) and one neuter, but no one really thinks about what gender the words are and they get categorized by their article rather than their gender. Though I don't even know how gender-neutral pronouns would get translated into other languages.
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Post by Nut on Feb 23, 2013 12:45:57 GMT -5
that raises an interesting point, though--how do you choose to express your identity? have you ever adapted to certain roles or behaviours in order to invoke specific assumptions in other people? do you think you conform to or defy whatever stereotypes might be placed on you because of your identity? I used to try to adapt to certain roles to try to get other people to pick up on my identity because I didn't want to say it myself, but it wasn't that effective and I generally just felt like I was putting on an act, so I eventually gave up. xD; I don't do much to express my identity most of the time, primarily because I can't be bothered to dress up or something if I'm just running errands or going jogging. I guess the most likely thing is that I'd express my identity through art at some point, as it would affect the things I choose to draw. xD I have always been really curious what people IRL assume about me from the surface, but no one's ever told me to my face. I think the strongest stereotype I convey is "nerd". xDD
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Post by Deleted on Feb 27, 2013 11:14:11 GMT -5
So I have a crush on this girl who has recently been flirting with me, and it turns out she's just a natural gal-pal sort of flirt and not gay/bi like I was hoping. :'D And I feel kind of dumb for misinterpreting her. *curls up in a ball*
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Post by Thorn on Mar 6, 2013 16:37:17 GMT -5
So I have a crush on this girl who has recently been flirting with me, and it turns out she's just a natural gal-pal sort of flirt and not gay/bi like I was hoping. :'D And I feel kind of dumb for misinterpreting her. *curls up in a ball* Don't feel dumb, Nat! *huggles* It must have been awkward, though. =(
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Post by Deleted on Apr 20, 2013 6:04:13 GMT -5
Sorry for reviving the topic (though I guess it hasn't been dead that long), but... I've been... slowly coming out as bi. ...And by slowly, I mean "snail Sisyphus pushing a boulder up a hill" slowly. One of the things that's been stopping me hasn't been so much the people who I'm afraid are going to judge me (who are a big problem to be sure, just one I'm not tackling yet), but more the ones who... won't see it as such a big deal?
I want people to know, but I don't want to make it seem like some announcement. I just want to be able to talk about whatever without having the thought "wait, that person doesn't know yet, and I don't want to have that conversation right now, better rephrase that". And hiding it is just making me feel more uncomfortable with it and sometimes making it seem like I'm hiding from myself. For example, I was talking with a friend about a male Youtube celebrity that seemed like they'd be awesome to hang out with, and when I was thinking about the reasons why, I realized "wait, no, I'm actually just attracted to him, how did I not realize that".
So... yeah. Consider this me coming incrementally more out of the closet as bisexual. ...This post was also going to ask how to start the conversation with friends without making it a big deal... but then I realized I could just simply say "I don't want to make a big deal out of this, but I just want to tell you". ...It seems silly that I didn't realize this, but it did take me three paragraphs to post here and say it wasn't a big deal, so clearly I'm not the best at summarizing my thoughts XD;;;
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Post by Ashten on Jun 13, 2013 18:09:16 GMT -5
Hey there, I'm a beautiful sparkly rainbow of lesbian-ness :3
I'm pretty much willing to be out to anyone except my family and this one group I do theater productions with. First show I did there, this one boy my age came out to the cast as gay, and they totally munched him. I cried, 'cause I felt so bad for him. Oh yeah, it's a Christian theater group. I came out to a few people there 'cause I knew they'd be okay with it and they were, but when I came out to one of my closest friends there, she completely knocked me down for it. I can't believe that people can be so hateful to others because of something they can't control. Racism once was okay but now people will look down on you if you make a single racist remark. Maybe one day homophobia will change as well.
Anyway I'd like to be added to the group list. And PM? Sure (:
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Post by Guesty McGuest on Jul 3, 2013 23:31:51 GMT -5
I think I might be an ace...but I'm not sure. I used to think I dreaded the thought of ever having "relations" because of my fear of getting pregnant, but now I'm not so sure. I did this quiz: www.brainfall.com/results/300/...and my answer came back as asexual. Still; tis only an online quiz, and I know it doesn't mean much. xD I dunno. Just thought I should say something.
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Post by Nut on Jul 15, 2013 20:26:41 GMT -5
Hey Sarah, welcome to the group! I am really sorry to hear about the responses that guy got at the theater group, as well as how your friend reacted. The closer you are the someone, the more painful it is for them to be rejecting. I hope that knowing you and him will help at least some of the members of the group to develop a kinder attitude. The only way we can change things is to keep on being open and honest about ourselves; everyone who does is making it that much easier for everyone else... but some environments definitely make that difficult or dangerous, and I'm really sorry that yours isn't accepting. Guest, I don't think you need to be sure right now; sexuality can be a fluid thing. You can identify as asexual for now if you find it makes you more comfortable. (I think of myself as pretty much asexual also.) Late reply but Hunter, I think the easiest way to not make a big deal about it is to be casual about it yourself and just talk about it as if you take it for granted, which... is not the easiest thing to do when you're not used to discussing it at all. xD; People who aren't bothered by that will probably just accept it as a fact pretty quickly and that'll make conversations a lot easier; it does get much more natural and comfortable to be open over time. Holding back because you don't want to get into awkward explanations is definitely really annoying and I do it around my parents a lot. <_< I'm actually currently trying to prep my mom by showing her stories about all these LGBT people so she'll be more used to hearing and talking about these subjects. >_> ...I don't think I've ever actually made a coming-out announcement to anyone, except maybe someone on dA. It just sort of gradually became obvious that I would talk about queer topics. xD;
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Post by Lizzie on Dec 30, 2013 12:33:31 GMT -5
so uh, figured id revive because i got a couple good resources! they both talk about pronouns in an academic way, but otherwise... 1 and 2 (this ones a little bit meaner about it, but it has WAY more) and im always on the lookout for more (and i know i have more), so ill update you when i find them! also, look! "Hello, Address me as..." pronoun stickers!
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Post by Selm on Jan 22, 2014 13:39:58 GMT -5
I realize this thread isn't active anymore due to the lack of openly queer NTWFers still regularly visiting the forum, but I do have something I'd like to share if there's anyone still here! @__@ I was searching for a gender-neutral pronoun chart to include as a reference in the short story I'm writing(it's going to be workshopped within my lit class), because one of the main characters is nonbinary. I couldn't find many that were very well-organized or included much variety, but I did find this and I'm rather fond of it! It's a revised version of the same chart featured on the wikipedia page, put together by genderneutralpronoun.wordpress. I didn't look through the rest of the site much so I don't know if it's reliable, but I think this chart on its own is a good resource and includes most of the more mainstream and popular gender-neutral pronouns. Selecting a gender-neutral pronoun in writing is difficult. @___@ My instinct is always to use the standard "they" when speaking, but that quickly gets confusing in writing, especially when there are multiple characters. I've mostly been using xe for characters lately(though I use an "i" in place of the "y" for possessive), although I'm starting to become slightly concerned with the ease of pronunciation. I believe the more common pronunciation is "zee" for parallelism with he/she, which makes more sense linguistically, but I've been pronouncing it in my head to rhyme with "they".
I like the look of ne, though. It feels as though it comes more naturally in speech and is less likely to interrupt the flow of the narrative. I think I'll experiment with using that more in the future, or perhaps invent a new set if I can't find one that fits the character or the story right. Although, it's good to keep in mind that pronoun selection is different in the real world because identity takes a priority over things like ease of pronunciation and speech.
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Post by Lizzie on Jan 27, 2014 20:19:23 GMT -5
speaaaaaaaking of openly queer people! disney had its first real (to my knowledge) openly mentioned and seen lesbian couple on its kids show good luck charlie. here's the clip (which im just gonna link in case anyone has slow loading internet) this has been met with a generally positive reaction (excluding those reactions from homophobic people and organizations-- and actually, i can find only one real organization thats mentioned as protesting it anyway.) and the characters are supposedly one-shot characters, unfortunately. (the series ends in february anyway) ((as a side note, selm, thank you for the chart on nonbinary pronouns!))
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Post by Ted (the zombie Dalek) on Jan 28, 2014 1:15:59 GMT -5
I realize this thread isn't active anymore due to the lack of openly queer NTWFers still regularly visiting the forum, but I do have something I'd like to share if there's anyone still here! @__@ I was searching for a gender-neutral pronoun chart to include as a reference in the short story I'm writing(it's going to be workshopped within my lit class), because one of the main characters is nonbinary. I couldn't find many that were very well-organized or included much variety, but I did find this and I'm rather fond of it! It's a revised version of the same chart featured on the wikipedia page, put together by genderneutralpronoun.wordpress. I didn't look through the rest of the site much so I don't know if it's reliable, but I think this chart on its own is a good resource and includes most of the more mainstream and popular gender-neutral pronouns. Selecting a gender-neutral pronoun in writing is difficult. @___@ My instinct is always to use the standard "they" when speaking, but that quickly gets confusing in writing, especially when there are multiple characters. I've mostly been using xe for characters lately(though I use an "i" in place of the "y" for possessive), although I'm starting to become slightly concerned with the ease of pronunciation. I believe the more common pronunciation is "zee" for parallelism with he/she, which makes more sense linguistically, but I've been pronouncing it in my head to rhyme with "they".
I like the look of ne, though. It feels as though it comes more naturally in speech and is less likely to interrupt the flow of the narrative. I think I'll experiment with using that more in the future, or perhaps invent a new set if I can't find one that fits the character or the story right. Although, it's good to keep in mind that pronoun selection is different in the real world because identity takes a priority over things like ease of pronunciation and speech. When I was roleplaying on Acitius, I sort of naturally adopted "ey" terms purely for clarification versus "they". Until a few minutes ago (reading one of the lists a few posts up), I had no idea it was already established! I think that's going to be my new go-to. Anyway, I feel you on the confusion front. I've naturally tended towards "they", when posting as Ted or describing a non-assigned individual, partly out of habit and partly because I've never really felt a connection with any of the more widely established neutral pronouns. Part of the reason I suppose is that I'm still confused about my gender identity, and "they" has that nice ambiguity to it. _ So, recently I've been becoming more comfortable with my identity (or lack thereof). I'm just going to try and be as natural as possible with it. Might be difficult, as every single person I've mentioned it to always has their own opinion on the matter, but knowing more trans* individuals irl has given me strength. I recently removed my gender on facebook, which I didn't know you could do, so that's already a step in the right direction. Man, so much of this seems to be wrapped up with my anxiety, my blogging and my Neopets success, and my struggles with adhering to the system. It's like for once I know who I am, and it's giving me courage. For all my problems associating with others, we are each and every one of us important. This is who I am, and it's who I was always meant to be. There's no one way to be human, so who am I to judge? You know?
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Post by Lizzie on Feb 13, 2014 21:36:51 GMT -5
two things have happened recently in the lgbtqia+ community that i found out about today. both are important, good news and bad news, but while the good news applies mostly to trans/nonbinary people, the bad news is seriously important, and is even life threatening, and inclues a petition to stop it. for the good news (good news first, right?) facebook has added a gender neutral pronoun, they/them (finally!) as well as 50+ new ways to identify. you can find it by going to update info>basic info>and then under gender, choose custom. as there was before, there is a way to set who can see your gender, and you can obviously choose your prounoun. hopefully, there will be more updates with more identities/pronouns soon! but then, there's the bad news. apparently, this has been widespread for about 2 days, but i only found out about it earlier today. the state of kansas (in the usa, for anyone overseas who doesnt know) has proposed a new bill, which you can read here. if you are too lazy to read it, you can read an article about it here. it says that, basically, people in kansas can deny gay people any goods and services if it goes against their "sincere religious beliefs". they can kick them out of school, kick them out of their homes (including foster care), deny them emergency services, can reject them from hospitals and police can even refuse to help them, just because of their sexuality or gender identity. which is just wrong, it violates human rights at the core. in an effort to combat this injustice, a petition has been formed, and for once, i will beg. please, please, please sign this.
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Post by Enn on Mar 1, 2014 13:27:15 GMT -5
but then, there's the bad news. apparently, this has been widespread for about 2 days, but i only found out about it earlier today. the state of kansas (in the usa, for anyone overseas who doesnt know) has proposed a new bill, which you can read here. if you are too lazy to read it, you can read an article about it here. it says that, basically, people in kansas can deny gay people any goods and services if it goes against their "sincere religious beliefs". they can kick them out of school, kick them out of their homes (including foster care), deny them emergency services, can reject them from hospitals and police can even refuse to help them, just because of their sexuality or gender identity. which is just wrong, it violates human rights at the core. in an effort to combat this injustice, a petition has been formed, and for once, i will beg. please, please, please sign this. These bills have been popping up all over the place, with Arizona's governor having to actually veto one that made it to her ( including some Arizona Republicans who voted FOR the bill asking her to veto it). I wish these bills could be taken as last-ditch attempts at anti-gay legislation, like the death throes of it, but man, this stuff seems to happen on a regular basis in the US. And then we have Uganda passing severe anti-homosexuality law, and a Uganda tabloid then posting its list of the 'top 200 homos', whilst Russia gets to host the Winter Olympics whilst implementing aggressively anti-gay laws and having Putin link homosexuals with paedophiles. SO. THERE'S THAT.
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Post by Lizzie on Mar 20, 2014 15:37:32 GMT -5
okay. so i realize that its probably. silly of me to ask for signatures this late in the game, but this petition to the white house (usa government) to recognize nonbinary genders needs 50k signatures by tomorrow. you DO NOT have to live in the usa to sign, and it would mean a lot to me and the rest of the nonbinary community if you could sign and pass on? <3 honestly, it doesnt take that horrible of a long time, and a whitehouse.gov account is always good just in case something else needs signing. thank you in advance <3
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